Had a dream where I discovered one of my cats had been shitting on the carpet in secret places throughout the house, and I only just discovered it after it had been going on for several months. I kept finding crusty old turds hidden like easter eggs. Room smelled like pee too so they were probably peeing as well.

Had a dream where my mom was walking around the house like everything was normal.

Shocked, I asked her what she was doing here. In a defensive tone, she replied that nobody will know she's here—the implication being that she'll get in trouble if someone from the afterlife finds out she left and returned to Earth.

I started panicking, since if I could see my mom here and talk to her, then I must be going insane. I kept shouting "I'm not crazy! I'm not crazy! She isn't here!" to hopefully snap out of my delusions, but she was still there.

At some point, I noticed my mom also brought home my childhood dog, Sam (the Akita), who's been dead since like 2003. This made me even more concerned and panicky.

My mom was trying to talk to me, but I closed my eyes, covered my ears with my hands, and repeatedly shouted "You're not here! You're not here!" while shaking my head. I thought I could make her go away, since she must be a figment of my imagination.

Unsure how it ended.

This dream is actually similar to one I had with my dad, only where I thought I was going crazy in this dream, I accused my dad of being an imposter in the other dream. In both dreams, I knew my parents were dead.

Had a dream that was very similar to The Thing. Basically me and my crew were stuck in this mountain warehouse, and like half the crew was infected. The survivors were trying to hide/barricade themselves within the factory, separate from the infected crew, until they could find a means of escape. But of course "survivors" gradually got infected and then became an internal threat.

At one point, I realized I could tell the difference between a real person and an imposter by just stabbing everyone who tried to enter the door in the face. The normal ones would just recoil in pain while the infected ones would immediately lash out.

We tried to escape in a giant dump truck (think: those massive earth-movers that are multiple stories high), but I think the vehicle got stuck (kind of like when I'm driving the Warthog in Halo with a passenger in the back and get the gunner killed lol). So then like everyone in the dump truck got beset with monsters and killed. I woke up before I died I think.

--

In another dream, my neighbor was having a heated disagreement with me about me cutting down a tree that bordered our property. Idk how it happened, but somehow the argument spilled over into us arguing in my kitchen. I then shot him in the face with my pistol, killing him instantly.

My first and only thought was: how can I hide the body and clean up all evidence so no one knows. Well, whatever I did, I did my best (I think I buried him in the yard).

Anyway, I spent the rest of the dream trying to act normal like nothing happened while the cops asked around if people knew what had happened to the neighbor. I think one thing I did was go on a day-trip with my uncle, which I would never ordinarily do because it'd be boring, but I had to make myself scarce and seem busy to avoid questioning.

Had a dream where I was in a gas station convenience store. Some lady was checking out with her items. A man swooped in a stole her Butterfinger bar and ran out of the store.

Me, the lady, and her husband chased the thief into this large candy warehouse / superstore. The store, as it turned out, was owned by Mrs. Sherry and Mr. Jeff, so I got to reconnect with them + their asshole kids.

Most of the candy was sold out (because it's almost Halloween), so I only had slim pickings of the shitty candy that was left.

Later in the dream, I was having an incredibly large family gathering. There were at least 100 people here. My yard had a giant wooden roof installed over part of it too, like 100ft long x 50ft, to cover the event. There were a bunch of small tents and buildings where people could gather to socialize individually.

I was in a rush to cater to everyone as host. However, at some point, I realized I had to pee really bad. So I found this tent/room where no one was inside, and I peed into a container (one of the containers from the candy warehouse), which was like 5 gallon capacity. I filled up the container rather quickly with pee, and then I started panicking because I still had to pee, so I pivoted (stream uninterrupted) and peed into some cookware: cooking pots, skillets, etc.

When I was done peeing, I zipped up and then looked around the room to notice that I had somehow overlooked a table full of people who were already in the room before I started peeing. They had watched the whole thing, but they were polite about it and pretended like they didn't see or know what I was doing.

Had a dream where me and the boys were involved in some religious cult.

None of us wanted to be there, but given how cults work, we were trapped there despite being "free to leave whenever you want" (but not really)

Anyway, we were at the cult facility watching a movie in their movie theater. It was some indoctrination video, I assume.

Before this, we hatched a plan to try leaving during the movie. We went to the theater lobby and said we'd like to check out and leave. The person at the lobby said okay, we were free to leave, but first we had to take a bunch of laxatives. The cult's logic was that, if we took a bunch of laxatives, then we wouldn't be able to leave because we'd have to shit for a long time.

However, we anticipated this and came up with a plan. (Fair warning: the following makes no logical sense, but it was logical in the dream world)

So to counter the laxative, Chris created this device, which was a bundle of 4 flexible tubes. Each tube contained a different variety of shit: clay colored, green, classic brown, soft vs. pebbles, etc. The bundle of tubes would be inserted into the anus so that the tube tube-poop would appear to be your own to an observer. The device would allow the user to trick people into thinking you were shitting, but really your own actual poop was still safely inside your body.

Anyway, we used this device to trick the cultists into thinking we were all shitting after taking the laxatives. But in reality, our own shits were staying inside our bodies (...which allowed us to escape somehow...? idk)

I think our first try failed (we got found out somehow), but the second try was successful. There was a chase scene of some sort, but I think we all escaped the cult.

This post was edited by Terps on Oct 24 2022 07:23pm

Had a dream where I was in traffic. I was headed home, and somebody wanted to turn left into the Delta Do-It Center, so I went around him on the shoulder.

As I got home and was getting out of my car, the guy who was turning left followed me home. It was Mr. Burke (Math and Science teacher from North Harford Middle School—idk if you guys had him but he was a kind and enthusiastic old man).

Mr. Burke was road-raging. He was incensed that I would go around him on the shoulder while he was turning left. I countered this by acting like I couldn't understand anything he was saying. He kept on being mad, and I responded by saying "Celsius?" which was not even a word he said.

My mannerisms and calmness seemed to frustrate Mr. Burke to the point where he gave up trying to yell at me. Completely off subject, I asked Mr. Burke if he'd like to look inside my pole barn for some free stuff, since I'm cleaning it out and have some tools etc. to give away.

Mr. Burke agreed to look around. At this point, Zach, Chris, and Brandon (ZCB) showed up out of nowhere to look around too and collect stuff they wanted.

The scavenging went on for several minutes until I noticed this little diorama someone had made. It was of some kind of ice cave entrance. As I stared at it, a monster of some sort came out of the entrance. It was at this point I remembered that I wasn't supposed to stare at this particular diorama because anyone who does so becomes caught in a random encounter.

I was minimized and teleported into the diorama world. I had to escape some gargoyles and a troll of some sort. I ran through the snow until I eventually made it back to my home somehow (it makes no logical sense).

Anyway, although I made it home, the troll was still after me. I led it to ZCB, since I figured if we all fought it together we could win.

At this point, we were all inside the master bedroom in my house, and ZCB were all wielding items they had found in my pole barn. In addition, the "troll" was just a fat guy who was otherwise just a normal caucasian human, although he was violent like a troll. We all essentially rolled initiative and went in turn order like in D&D.

Since I didn't have a weapon of any sort, I ran off to find something while ZCB fought the troll. It took way longer than expected to find a weapon, and I felt kind of bad for ZCB. Eventually I gave up and returned empty-handed.

Zach and Brandon were nowhere to be found, but Chris was incapacitated, as was the troll. I picked up Chris's weapon, which was a novelty oversized #2 pencil, and started beating the troll in the face with it to ensure he was dead. I realized after hitting the troll a few times that the novelty pencil was kind of rubbery and not a very good weapon.

At this point, the troll woke up, since I guess he wasn't very unconscious. I kept hitting him in the face with the pencil, but it wasn't seeming to do anything, so I ran off.

Idk what happened to Chris.

This post was edited by Terps on Oct 27 2022 11:33am

Had a dream where I was a prison guard. The prison was basically the one from Shutter Island, all decrepit and spooky. (Just re-watched that btw)

There were children in the prison—adolescents. I thought this was kind of sad and unjust, but ultimately I didn't want to lose my job...

There was a comedic moment where kids kept escaping their cells, and I had to keep rounding them back up. Think: a Benny Hill sketch.

At some point, Chris came down to visit me. He had something important to say—a one-on-one conversation. I stopped worrying about the escaped children for the moment and let them run around freely so I could talk to Chris.

Chris informed me that he was moving to Iowa. He couldn't hide the excitement on his face. I guess he felt like he should be disappointed to leave his friends behind, but he was really happy for this opportunity over in Iowa. I didn't ask him why he was leaving, but I figured it was job-related.

I congratulated him. I wanted to help him feel better about any guilt he might have had by reminding him that we hang out online most of the time anyway these days, so it wouldn't actually be that much different.

He thanked me and went on his way.

This post was edited by Terps on Nov 16 2022 12:19am

Had a dream where, for whatever reason, I cut off part of my dick and balls.

Surprisingly, there wasn't any blood. Instead, it looked like a clean anatomical cross-section, like something you'd see in a medical book.

Realizing I'd made a huge mistake, I tried to crudely press the parts of my body that I'd cut off back together like you would with a piece of clay. This actually kind of worked: the balls mostly held together as long as I didn't move around much.The dick was kind of messed-up looking because it got stretched in one part (again, like clay), but this just made it longer, so not all bad. I reasoned that if I just didn't move around much then it would heal back up eventually.

--

Had a dream where I had people over. Somehow or another, they discovered the drawer in my house where I keep cash.Only, instead of stealing my cash, they were stealing candy. In any case, I was distressed because I didn't have much candy, and I didn't want them stealing it. Had to shoo them away.

Had a dream where I did something to merit getting arrested. Rather than face this, Chris and his police friends decided to help me out in evading arrest. They instructed me to point my .22 pistol at some police building and start firing until the building turned to rubble.

When I fired my gun, it was like CoD when you fire a gun with tracer rounds and insane bullet drop. I was pretty far away from the building I was supposed to shoot, so I had my pistol pointed at a 45 degree angle, trying desperately to lob some shots on the building.

Apparently when building my loadout I didn't use the correct ammunition, so Chris's cop friends just ended up shooting the building to rubble for me. Then they helped me evade arrest by being comically inept at their job of capturing me. It was like in college football when players pretend to whiff at some anemic Make a Wish kid, patronizingly allowing him to score a TD.

--

In another dream, my house burned down. I think this was on my mind because me and some discord friends were talking about insurance. I know I'm probably under-covered for home insurance, so maybe that's why it's on my mind. Plus I've just been thinking about my house a lot lately in general.

Oddly enough, even though my house burned down, certain things within it were perfectly fine. Like where I keep my money and my Magic cards were unscathed.

Had a dream where there was a lot of crime going on in the local town of Whiteford. It was basically a free for all, with people robbing, looting, and assaulting each other.

I went down there with Chris and Brandon (but not Zach) to check it out.

At one point, while we were checking out the pizza place, there was a loud explosion from the house across the street. We went to investigate.

Simultaneous to all this, it started flooding. The scene quickly became like one of those disaster areas you see on TV with deep brown water everywhere. Water filled the lowest parts of Whiteford.

Inside the hardware/lumber store, the wares were floating in water. Chris, Brandon, and several other people were there checking it out, some of them looting. Then, the whole building started collapsing. I tried to get near a support beam by the wall (which I did), but it wasn't enough to save me.The roof collapsed, and I blacked out.

I awoke in a hospital bed as a kid again. A Lass (the pokemon variety) had found me and rescued me, along with several others. The hospital person explained that I stopped breathing for a period of time, suggesting that I lost oxygen to the brain and suffered brain damage. I was resuscitated by some old butch lady at the pizza place, but apparently I couldn't remember any of what happened.

The hospital wanted me to start rehabbing so I could be independent, so they dropped me in a wheelchair and asked me to turn right. Apparently my brain had become so damaged that I didn't know how to turn my wheelchair right, so I instead came very close to falling out as my right foot got trapped under the front wheel somehow. I caught myself just in time before falling out though.

While rehabbing, hospital staff explained that they had to do open heart surgery on me after receiving me. Apparently I had shrapnel in/around my heart, which they dug out with a special machine. I nearly died. Plus my leg was kind of fucked up, but they didn't bother doing anything with that. Also Chris and Brandon were involved in the roof collapse, but they didn't say what happened to them. I never saw them again...

The hospital staff all left the room at this point and stopped supervising me during the rehab process.

I guess the scene skipped several months/years and I was back in HS. I was trying to get to class, but I was still in a wheelchair, and there were all kinds of obstacles. The dream started to become an anxiety dream: to get to my class, I had to pass through a bunch of other full classrooms that were already in progress, and they were packed full, so there was no room for a wheelchair to get by without greatly inconveniencing everyone by asking them to move.And then I'd realize I was in the wrong classroom and have to backtrack... and then backtrack from my backtrack because I'd realize I actually was headed the right way. It was embarrassing and I felt bad for everyone else. Eventually I just started teleporting at-will because I was tired of asking people to move.

I had to wake up and go to the bathroom at this point. Wake-up alarm was 5 mins away, so that's why I was able to write all this down in a timely manner and remember most of it pretty well; didn't have to go right back to sleep.