Quote (EndlessSky @ Jul 17 2022 11:02pm)

Maybe you're just a bad, selfish date.

Quote (JessiWan @ Jul 17 2022 11:10pm)

I don't know if he's that, but honestly sex with a virgin shouldn't be bad, if you really love the girl. Sex is not only about the gratification of your carnal desires. It's about being intimate with someone, not just physically but also emotionally. Exploring each other's body, you teaching and guiding her...getting to know her really intimately. It should be an experience. For him to write off sex with a virgin like that, it tells me he is probably not a very imaginative, tender lover. No offense to OP.

Quote (Sturmgeist @ Jul 17 2022 04:16pm)

I'm a hypocrite. I've been with a decent amount of women. Even by today's standards.

I wouldn't marry a woman who was a hoe.

I like the quote "A lock that can be opened by any key is a shitty lock. A key that can open many locks is a master key."

:banana:

Quote (Loipisdead @ Jul 18 2022 12:56pm)

None taken at all, It's hard to explain to people how sex with a virgin is if they have never been there. I also have a rule I would never date/sleep with anyone under 21 for the exact reason you stated Jesse, love is about intimacy, maturity, friendship, sacrifices and everything in-between, I need someone who's experienced the same thing I've gone through, love, hate, getting cheated on and your heart broken. It was fine when I was a teenager, but once you start you realize you need someone who is more mature in everyway possible. My longest relationship was 9 years if anyone cares to know. You just have to experience it yourself to understand it I guess ^enslesssky

Let's say you're playing duos on blackout , your partner represents your significant other and getting first place represents spending your life together. You're not gonna team with someone who literally just installed the game and never played before haha. You could team with someone like that, just because, but chances are you won't make it to the finish line with that person. That's a decent analogy I can think of

Quote (EndlessSky @ Jul 18 2022 01:41pm)

Yea I overreacted.

Its pretty painful for them the first time. Youre kind of right. You have to teach them and be really patient. If you want the fun experience right away, itll be harder.

It just really rubbed me the wrong way, because for them it was a pivotal memory in their life. But for you it was just a burden without accommodating her circumstances.

Quote (Loipisdead @ Jul 17 2022 09:02pm)

Recently I saw video of a couple who were just married. the interviewer asked what their body counts were
the woman replied 9, the man she was with looked like his soul left his body
I do not understand how 9 is considered a high body count, I don't understand how body count even matters if you are both in a loving relationship. The past should be completely irrelevant.
My body count is in the high 60s-70s. If I actually sat down and tried to think of every single one I wouldn't be able to, Ive tried
My gfs body count is in the high 30s. Woman enjoy sex just as much as men do, men think they can sleep with whoever and however many people but shame a woman for doing the same
I understand both sides completely, being bi sexual and being with a handful of men made me realize its literally the same as being with a woman. its just sex. and it doesn't matter.

So , jsp, would you shame a woman for having a high body count? and if so, why?
Her past should be completely irrelevant to you as long as shes faithful to YOU while shes with you.
A woman sleeping with 30,40,50+ men has zero impact on me, it kinda blew my mind that the "men" in these videos got so butthurt over the SMALLLLLEST number

To me it shows how insecure men are, men can sleep with whoever many people they want but when a woman does it shes considered trashy
It makes absolutely no sense
Sex is just sex, its something humans do for fun, to feel good, and many other reasons.
Shaming a woman for enjoying sex just shows how insecure of a "man" you are in my opinion


I tried to post this in a way it would be an appropriate topic for the love line forum, if Ive overstepped any boundaries or rules please just close the thread and let me know. Im not here to get in trouble or offend. Im legit just curious why men get so upset about something so trivial

Quote (Leeevee @ Jul 18 2022 02:57pm)

Mate, I have read the entirety of this thread and it hurts me to see how little you understand of the subject. You are clearly not educated in any social or medical field, which is completely fine.
If you ask for people's affirmation that your attitude is "the right one", which this thread is clearly an appeal for, at least take the people's answer as feedback. Do with it what you will, but you're just telling everybody they're dead wrong and you're right.

I seriously, deeply, strongly implore you to read this book by Bessel van der Kolk, a man who busied himself with writing and rewriting the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders).
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma

You clearly seek answers for questions that busy you on the subject of intimacy and I feel you have a long way to go before opening up to what other people might answer.
I hope you find whatever you're looking for, mister.

Quote (Loipisdead @ Jul 18 2022 09:05pm)

lol what? all because Im not bothered by a womans past and I can find a life long partner regardless of her sexual history?
Ive found what im looking for, after my last 9 year relationship I finally found my other half. im 34 and shes the first person ive ever trusted completely.
I don't understand why that is at all relevant when im just asking if men care about a womans body count
For someone to shame another for their sexual history is definetly wrong. You CAN find a wife and life long partner in a woman with a high body count.
A cheater is always going to cheat, no matter if shes been with 2 men or 10 or 50. A womans morals are not based off of how many men she sleeps with.

EDIT: on a side note, I do love to read, I will add that to my list of books I plan on getting in the future

Quote (Leeevee @ Jul 18 2022 03:19pm)

That's projection mate, and scientifically speaking flawed. But I'm not interested in discussing a subject of which your mind is currently fixed and unable to grasp anything beyond your own view (no offense, but your replies show at least that much). What interests me more is letting you know that this particular reply to me shows egosyntonia, and that may be unjustified. The fact that you attack everyone who even remotely points out that it may be unjustified to some degree is evident of where you are in understanding the subject you wish to explore, as is apparent by the existence of this thread.

tldr; re-read replies and take what you need without annihilating the author. There's much to learn in some of the replies in here for you, if only you were more willing to learn >.>

Quote (Loipisdead @ Jul 18 2022 09:23pm)

im always open for debate and have no problem being proved wrong. all I can do is go off of my own personal experience and what ive seen from others. same for everyone else I guess, they go off their own personal experiences
from my personal experience, body count is irrelevant
but a lot of men get hurt by it, at the same time as sleeping with whatever comes their way
its a double standard and you can't sit here and tell me it isn't

Quote (Leeevee @ Jul 18 2022 12:45pm)

I don't know if "a lot of men get hurt by it and at the same time sleep with whatever comes their way". If you have fuckboys on the one hand and nice guys on the other, and men who judge women for a high body count on the one hand and men who do not on the other, you're left with 4 possible combinations. And that is with the stupidly childish assumption that you can categorize reality in such a way lol