thanks... so my conclusion I think I'll go with this:
dual grief pb
guil helm (ias/ar jool)
highlord
fortitude
SoE
ravenfrost
dual leech rare ring
LoH
gore rider

might merc:
reapers toll
bug fort
andy's

and now comes to skill allocation. what to max? sure I need to max the sword mastery, frenzy (in this case since many people recommended it) other than that what else?

i did it like this:
max frenzy
max sword mastery + 1pt each: incr. stamina/speed/nat. res/iron skin
max bo, taunt (found this a bit more useful than doubleswing, same bonus to frenzy) + 1pt each: howl, shout, battlecomand
rest into double swing

if you play without eni i'd also stat 1pt leap
berzerk was not needed and imo is a waste of points if not ww

If you use reaper merc use gface instead of andy

for the cb right? yea that's a better option

no berserk then how to deal with im?

and DS. Combines with reaper's ds

I've played barbs for a while so there's a lot I can say here. Frenzy is certainly for the damage and boss/uber killing, but WW is definitely more fun

Since most advice will be repeats of each other, right now I'll just say if you want to switch from the usual Grief or EBotD combo, Death + Destruction are fun especially when going with frenzy (remember procs don't work with WW).

If you're looking to be a one-man wrecking machine in ubers, Grief + LW works beautifully because you're freed from being chained to Dracs (and prebuffing from Treachery) so you can use Steelrends in their place. (Ofc LoH do more damage but I like to be able to move from area to area w/o switching gear). Cranium Basher really ramps up the damage if you go with mace mastery! Don't forget you can use BO sticks (NPC-bought weaps with +3 to warcries) to save the fg on dual CTA's.

Be wary of anyone telling you to use Enigma over Fort; nigma really nerfs you since barbs don't benefit from +skills the way other classes do (i.e., knock it off with bk rings already). Fort is a no-brainer here.

IMHO, maxing Iron Skin is a must. I easily reach 30k+ def with a2 merc. Speaking of, mercs are even more of a personal preference. This guide --> http://forums.d2jsp.org/topic.php?t=34222950 tells you the viable options. Real quick - if you want merc to do damage, a2 nm off with Guilly/Treach/Reaper; if you want a tank that stays alive, a2 norm/hell def with Gaze(cham'd)/Fort/Ebotd.

Also I've always found Metalgrid to be far more useful than Highlord's. This takes care of that pesky attack rating problem.

if you found metalgrid is more useful because of the ar and def then in this case wouldn't it be even better to use The Mahim-Oak Curio since it adds 10% ar and def?

You don't need a lot of AR for pvm