That's cuz it wasn't good cocaine.
I read about your life and I understand that you're a successful gentleman that got in trouble with weed, alcohol and crack.
I feel badly that you can't get it up and that you can't orgasm. By now your brain and body might be too fried for you to enjoy normal things.
I hope you continue to update us with your process. You seem self aware but you also need an anchor in your life. In the other thread you said you believe in God. I'm also sorry that you said you've been hitting dabs your whole life and that it no longer works for you. I'd hate to be in your position even though it sounds like you have a lot of good things working for you.
Its good you have the house and car paid off and all those other resources you mentioned. These are resources of a particular kind, but it seems like you need a spiritual anchor.
All gods are not made the same. Elevate Jesus and he will suffice as your anchor.
All the best my journeyman.