You're the type of husband to spread the butter on the inside of a cooled biscuit and not on top when it's fresh out the oven
You're the one googling Google while I'm over here playing with a abacus.
First and foremost im not buttering shit as the alpha male provider of my household.
Second off, emphasis on "playing" with an abacus (which i assume you mean the bead toys they offer at the doctor's offices as you dont have the mental fortitude to even comprehend basic math)
Seek medical attention for your amnesia, because you forgot that I'm HIM