big if true

You hung out with your parents in the summer? Explains a lot.

my dad one year bought me and my step brother a universal studios season pass we were like 12 he would drop us off there and go to work. i rode the hulk roller coaster 6 times in a row and puked everywhere

Throw em on an ipad and coddle them so they grow up to be too awkward to move out like most jsp’ers
then you’re stuck with em until the grave

Sent them on summer camp, a cheap one

Send them into the catacombs

$300/week for decent ones

Marry a teacher, they get off too. #protip.

consequences of your own actions

Ask your parents how they put up with you