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#71
Feb 24 2015 12:10pm
Motivational speech from Virgin




Guys are getting it
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#72
Feb 24 2015 12:20pm
Quote (et3rnal @ 24 Feb 2015 07:12)
this is why i post here. i'm not getting this kind of honest from most people i know in real life. thanks bro. really appreciate your feedback


I'm glad you understood the heart of my post. I'm not trying to be a judgemental ass or anything. I know that people make mistakes, myself included. Nobody is above reproach but I will call it like it see it too. The real victim in this is the little girl. And then, a distant second, you got a raw deal too.

truthfully, I hope you don't get stuck paying child support. I think it's ethically wrong to force someone in your position to do that when they neither want to nor should have to.

I also hope that little girl can have a decent upbringing, and not be fatherless. I grew up essentially fatherless and it's no way to be raised. It is a better option than having a total POS for a father (not referring to you, just saying in general) tho.

Know that one day, there is a chance that little girl may resent you for rejecting her. I know you're not the biological father, but there is more to being a father than being a biological cause for someone's existence and she should grow up with a father figure. Genetics shouldn't always matter.

Nobody will fault you for walking away. I quite possibly would too. A better man wouldn't (and I know you said you may stick around in some capacity, that's cool). Especially if the real father won't step up to the plate and be a dad.
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#73
Feb 24 2015 04:49pm
inafter - op gets banned
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#74
Feb 24 2015 05:10pm
your only option ...murder..
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#75
Feb 24 2015 05:30pm
Wow that sucks op. Glad you're getting out of it though
what a conniving, chicanerous, nefarious cunt
Makes me very angry certain individuals are so selfish they literally care only about themselves. Sad world.
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#76
Feb 24 2015 05:40pm
Quote (MrBobMarley @ Feb 23 2015 05:34pm)
Just logged in to chime in on this brother. Heard from the guys what happened, sucks dick. Really sorry to hear man. But you just gotta move on, learn from it and grow.

We legit just went over a case regarding this. The girl in good faith believed this guy to be the dad, even though she did not know for certain. Odd shit, courts are usually in favor of the girl. But the girl reasonably relied on the guys promise to pay child support and they dated, and when he found out the kid was not his, the court still forced him to pay child support.

Saw a few people on BB post about that, only read a couple pages.

The courts reasoning for this has a couple of factors.

1. (public policy) They ultimately want someone to be paying child support, here it seems likely that she may know who the father is, so it's not like no one will be paying.
2. The wife in the case, reasonably relied on the promise to pay child support. Due to that, there was a contract between the husband and wife. Even though it was based on a false fact. (she in good faith believed he was the father). Did she know you weren't? If you can get that fact out, then that would pretty much close the issue.

While the 1st doesn't apply to your situation (you are gonna want to actually know for certain who the dad is), the 2nd might. While she says she doesn't even want your money, that is now man. Think of it, shit just came crashing down, she isn't wanna increase the hate for her right now. But think a year down the line, she might have a change of heart and want the money. The statute of limitations is at least a year, so she has time to decide if she wants it or not. I'm sure your lawyer knows all this, but might be worth to bring it up.

anyways man, best of luck.

PS: make sure your lawyer isn't a POS and is doing his work. Where did you find him and have you done any research? You're gonna want to get a lawyer or a firm that specializes in this type of work (family law/divorce)


wait, would this not be just easily beatable in court? Like you are proven NOT to be the father.. they still make you pay.. sue the fuck out of all these highly incompetent individuals? Srs, it seems like it'd be a quick and easy process but of course I don't know the reality of the situation.
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#77
Feb 24 2015 05:55pm
Quote (Balla @ Feb 24 2015 11:40pm)
wait, would this not be just easily beatable in court? Like you are proven NOT to be the father.. they still make you pay.. sue the fuck out of all these highly incompetent individuals? Srs, it seems like it'd be a quick and easy process but of course I don't know the reality of the situation.


eh you would think, but no.

There is this thing called equitable estoppel.

Normally promises are not enforceable.
But if you make a promise, and someone reasonably relies on that promise, then that can form a contract :/

So if you promise to pay child support, and the woman relies on the promise, the man might be required to pay. I don't have the text in front of me, but I believe the woman is required to minimize the damages. In the other case, the woman didn't know who the actual dad was, so the court ordered the man to pay child support for a kid that was not his.
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#78
Feb 25 2015 06:23am
Quote (MrBobMarley @ Feb 24 2015 06:55pm)
eh you would think, but no.

There is this thing called equitable estoppel.

Normally promises are not enforceable.
But if you make a promise, and someone reasonably relies on that promise, then that can form a contract :/

So if you promise to pay child support, and the woman relies on the promise, the man might be required to pay. I don't have the text in front of me, but I believe the woman is required to minimize the damages. In the other case, the woman didn't know who the actual dad was, so the court ordered the man to pay child support for a kid that was not his.


from what i understand from my attorney, these rulings are on a state basis and there's really no precedence for it in TN

i'm not worried about child support though. she even told me again yesterday that she wasn't going to push for it...
i mean just think, she's already embarrassed herself in front of all her friends and family. if she tried to get me to pay child support she would push EVERYONE away from her because of how chitty that is.
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#79
Feb 25 2015 06:32am
Quote (et3rnal @ Feb 25 2015 08:23am)
from what i understand from my attorney, these rulings are on a state basis and there's really no precedence for it in TN

i'm not worried about child support though. she even told me again yesterday that she wasn't going to push for it...
i mean just think, she's already embarrassed herself in front of all her friends and family. if she tried to get me to pay child support she would push EVERYONE away from her because of how chitty that is.


Where do you live at in TN?
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#80
Feb 25 2015 06:32am
Quote (orpimpin1201 @ Feb 25 2015 07:32am)
Where do you live at in TN?


chattanooga

Quote (Balla @ Feb 24 2015 06:30pm)
Wow that sucks op. Glad you're getting out of it though
what a conniving, chicanerous, nefarious cunt
Makes me very angry certain individuals are so selfish they literally care only about themselves. Sad world.


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