need help... i wanna go to the pool without looking like an idiot...

Nunchucks with arm weights

Eat more vegetables, less fruit/junk.

Cut sugar, especially anything containing high fructose corn syrup.

who cares? you're invisible to girls anyway

Or...workout for 15 minutes and eat all the shit you want

Unfortunately doesn't work that way. The data is in and exercise doesn't make a difference in the long-term calories burnt. By increasing your exercise (which is only ~30% of your daily calorie expenditure) your body compensates by lowering your basal metabolism (the other 70%) so over the long term you burn roughly the same amount of calories.

Of course you can change this if you are working out like 6 hours a day like an olympian, but for 99% of people exercise isn't a way to lose weight.

can i get some examples?

am i not allowed to eat any fruit? apples have been my favorite since i was born and i started eating bananas in the morning

exercismo

lay off the poop

You're probably fine eating fruit as long as you cut out other sources of HFCS like soda, candy, etc.