come out, storm the studio



each key tapped to the BPM of the sirens

Take a shower first

had psychosis yesterday so topic and song title made me hmm and flashback h3h3

oh daym what happened brotha?

if you want to/are ok to talk about it that is

This post was edited by Devil_kin on Jun 21 2016 01:50pm

You are one fuck ed up individual

too much of 3-meo-pcp + some 4f-mph + alc and spend the evening / night till 5am talking with a guy recovering from psychosis but he's still hearing voices and got some wild electric feelings synesthesia dream stuff

we were at bedrock and guys wanted to go to flat because it was getting late but was still too out of it / fragile state so kept the pace but spend the few hours in weird positions to ease the feeling and was talking to guy

at some point started to think that someone was communicating trough him - that happened dozens of times during 30-1h but got over that

when arrived to my station my body got cleared i've got 24/7 headache and murky headspace but feeling in head, body and mind got clear and started to hear clearer good spirited voices and i felt connected and electric and possibly a bit telephatic they were guiding, sane and supportive - at some point some said like jesus etc which ofc makes me think if i have possibility of powers/awareness of jesus that bring big repsonsibility and in that fragile state it flips me out - kinda didnt feel like smoking because felt so clear but wanted to because of stress but voices were saying you cant smoke anymore

on bus an anxious guy came to sit near and heard loud voice of "oh fuck more voices..." which seemed like coming from his thoughts telepathically

walking to home my head and body started to scramble a bit started to disconnect from that electirc field wich was offputting but coped reasonably well and the voices were very surprised of that but there were some negative ones at that point because was freaking out

tried to get some sleep and wondered should i take some antipsych but took just 10mg of melatonin and tried to get some sleep / meditate / go lusic dream for guidance sleeping back - it went well at first and got some supportive feedback but after some time started to scrable a lot, was tired and couldnt sleep so switched to sideways which disconnected me as i suspected

when woke up today got fainter echo of the feeling but been drinking for 3 weeks so was fatigued and wasnt up to the responsibility to keep that all positive vibe so after some pondering bought three beers and chips + dip with last money we had

if id have money would have probably would have kept drinking few beers everyday for a while start exercising but now ill do the latter (im in poor cardio health) so its def for the better and switching tobacco to swedish snuff (snus) nice that got plenty of those in freezer since ran out of money/they are sold only in sweden
+ will borrow some money from parents for healthy food since dont have any

sorry for novel lenght lol

+ last week i had an intense psychosis about world being a god/spirit test simulation

For a while i was trying to Lucid dream, until one day when i was on the toilet having an especially nasty shit and the thought dawned on me "what if im in bed right now shitting all over the place?"

I dont know how the fuck you guys handle all this voice in your head shit. Less drugs imo

is 3-meo-pcp different to pcp?

sounds like a bad trip man that sucks, you feeling ok now? make sure you're eating and sleeping right before you start exercising dude you don't wanna end up like me the other day. i have some shrooms under the mattress, waiting until i'm in a better space before i hit that.




it's very easy. pinch your nostrils and try to breathe through your nose. if you can do it then you're in a dream.

i don't have voices in my head though when i was a teenager and blazed up all day err day i sometimes did. i'm pretty well grounded all things considered.

This post was edited by Devil_kin on Jun 21 2016 02:57pm