Kinda gay.

Good luck. It sucks for a while, then it continues to suck but slightly less as time goes on.



I know, people always attention whoring by sharing their grief on a message board.

What a fucking faggot.

You mean you just randomly cry less n' less as time goes on?

Yeah, pretty much.

It's still gay, of course, and you'll never get all the way over it. But you'll get over the worst of it before you know it.

some of the people in this thread are pretty fucked up.

Thanks for the encouragement. :\

It's all good.

Don't get all mad at yourself for the thoughts that will go through your head. You'll think at least a few things that are fucked up and hate yourself for thinking them, but it's a normal part of the process of grief.

You might want to find some sort of professional if there's one available. Maybe check at school or something for someone who can help you out. Just having someone you can talk to who isn't going through the same shit can be a big help.

I actually told a few people (friends) the moment it happened, but, when they came home and said she didn't make it like, I pretty much quit talking about it to anyone.
Everybody asks how I'm doing/feeling and all I say is "Yup," 'cause I don't want to talk about it or really think about it.. although I do when I go to bed.

Nice one, God.

But in complete seriousness, if it's for real then Muted as my sincerest apologies. Truly.

Perfectly normal.

Friends are good to talk about it with too, and you should absolutely open up after you give yourself a little bit of time, but professionals are really good at getting to the roots of shit like this and sort of letting the emotions out.

Think of the feelings you have like an infected wound. Right now, it's so stuffed up with the inflammation of your grief and your guilt and a thousand other feelings that the wound can't even heal, it's just festering. By letting yourself talk about it, it's like draining out that pus so that the wound can start healing.

Kind of a gross metaphor, but at least vaguely accurate. IMO. I'm no professional in the situation or anything of the sort, but I've known plenty of people who went through this sort of shit, and that's what I've picked up about it.

It's not that gross, n' thanks... I'll find someone to talk to.