Quote (thesnipa @ Jul 7 2016 05:22pm)

If they're trying to co parent its not uncommon to have family time, even though they aren't together. It sounds to me like you're extremely paranoid she's cheating on you with him. The way i see it you have reletively few options.

1. If she's cheating or you can't get over him being there alone with her (but not doing anything) let her go. She's better off without you and vice versa given trust issues.

2. Be ok with her being alone with him, aka trust her to not suck him off in the shower.

Attempting to drive a wedge in between a mother and father because you're insecure that shes fucking him is pretty unfair to the child in the situation. if it were simply an ex bf situation with no kid you'd be entirely in the right. Perhaps he lives in a shithole or is even homeless and doesn't want to take the kid to that environment, but still wants to see his kid. Or maybe she's still banging him every time you guys get in a fight about her not banging him and she needs to be dumped. But there really shouldnt be an issue with him being there unless you don't trust her, in which case since there's kids involved that you're on deck to raise get away from it. You can't raise kids with a broad you dont trust on a basic level.

Quote (thesnipa @ 7 Jul 2016 13:22)

If they're trying to co parent its not uncommon to have family time, even though they aren't together. It sounds to me like you're extremely paranoid she's cheating on you with him. The way i see it you have reletively few options.

1. If she's cheating or you can't get over him being there alone with her (but not doing anything) let her go. She's better off without you and vice versa given trust issues.

2. Be ok with her being alone with him, aka trust her to not suck him off in the shower.

Attempting to drive a wedge in between a mother and father because you're insecure that shes fucking him is pretty unfair to the child in the situation. if it were simply an ex bf situation with no kid you'd be entirely in the right. Perhaps he lives in a shithole or is even homeless and doesn't want to take the kid to that environment, but still wants to see his kid. Or maybe she's still banging him every time you guys get in a fight about her not banging him and she needs to be dumped. But there really shouldnt be an issue with him being there unless you don't trust her, in which case since there's kids involved that you're on deck to raise get away from it. You can't raise kids with a broad you dont trust on a basic level.

Quote (NitemareBear @ Jul 7 2016 05:22pm)

Hey bud, just a few things:

1) it's his kid, not yours. If he wants to be a part of that kid's life then kudos to him and he should be allowed to as long as he's level-headed, isn't abusive, etc. Kids definitely come first and that's something the 2 of them share, he's always going to be a part of her life because of the kid they had together.
now that being said, there's a very fine line between letting him seeing the kid, and her wanting to see him. This honestly sounds like she's fooling around with him. I don't know you, or them, but from an outside perspective from someone who just went thru something very similar, she's probably cheating on you with him.
I mean hell, they have history together and the dude is over there at 11pm to "see the kid"? the kid should be in bed at that time.

2) If I were you I would cut your losses and just get out. Even if she isn't sleeping with him, she is making you suspect it (for a reason) and doesn't care how it makes you feel. She doesn't respect you and it's going to hurt more if you stay with her and she keeps doing this stuff.

I just got out of a 3.5 year relationship to a girl I was engaged to. We moved to a new city together (after living together for 2 years) and she moved ahead of me by 3 weeks so we didn't have to commute for our jobs until I found work there.
The day I moved over there I found out she had been spending the past 3 weeks with another dude, drinking over at his house, and it was causing serious problems in our relationship. We talked about it, she decided we better sleep in seperate rooms, and then she went over to his place, got drunk, and stayed the night at his place.
So I left her, and it hurt like hell. But atleast I got out when I did because I was in a really fucking dark place last weekend.

Get out while ya can man, it's not worth it.

Quote (AiNedeSpelCzech @ Jul 7 2016 05:26pm)

I'd definitely lean much more heavily in this direction if it wasn't for some 11 PM shit and the dude slashing his tires, etc.

Quote (PitchinQuarters @ 7 Jul 2016 13:28)

Yea man and the night I got into a fight with him at her house it was around 1am that he showed up. Asking me what I was doing there and that she had told him he was her bf now. She didnt deny any of it she just looked at the ground like a scared little kid

Quote (AiNedeSpelCzech @ Jul 7 2016 05:37pm)

lol, especially this, for sure. She plaaaayin.

Quote (Flameyes @ 7 Jul 2016 13:39)

there's a whole subforum to post this in bruh

Quote (PitchinQuarters @ 7 Jul 2016 13:39)

Seems like she likes to play the victim, shell always just say something like he wont leave me alone blah blah. Shes probably telling him exactly what shes telling me. And he has taken the kid before, away from the house to his so him not having anywhere to take the kid isnt the problem. I just simply wanted her to not have him in her house alone with her for like 8 hours until midnight