there was this lady speeding down the freeway, and she comes upon a bridge
as she is passing over the bridge, surely, she spots a policeman on the other side with a radar gun, and when she passes him, he puts on his lights and pulls her over
when he comes to get her license and registration, he asks , "why were you speeding today" and the woman replies
"im late for work"... what do you do? the policeman asks, and the woman tells him, "im an asshole stretcher". taken aback by this, the policemen asks,
"what does an asshole stretcher do?" to which the women says ," well first, i put one finger in and slowly pull to either side until i can get 2 fingers in
then 3 and eventually my whole fist, then i slowly work it so i can put my other fist in there too, and when i can do that, i start stretching until its about 6ft"
Totally surprised by this, the cop asks, "what do you do with a 6ft asshole?" and the woman replies
"you give him a radar gun and post him on the other side of a bridge"