Rainy Mornings >
Love them. The sound is so calming.
I definetly needed this.

Anthone said that he has a surprise for me on Sunday, but Sunday is the only day it's not supposed to rain...

Made snow cones with Anthone yesterday.
Went wool sweater hunting in MULTIPLE good wills.
Yes you can say we went goodwill hunting

Mom wants preshrunk wool sweaters to make mittens out of. An other things.

Going to download league today?

Anthone has shaped up some.
Hasn't been bothering me and making me upset.
I really appreciate this.

Listening to the rain fall while going to sleep is both soothing and distracting.

Anthone has car troubles
Forces him to take his 3 week break from school early
So he won't be able to go to Michigan with us.
I guess things happen for a reason...

I slept horribly
Never more than 2 consecutive hours sleeping.
Then, in a dream I like passed out and I couldn't breathe
It was scary

Horrible head cold

things eat me up like no other.

i read this,
and i like it, so i shall share it.
okay? okay.



“1. There will be several days that you daydream about stepping in front of a city bus. Don’t. It will not be beautiful. It will not be brave. It will be selfish. It will be broken. Your mother will cry.
2. Don’t write for him. Write for you. Write for others like you. Write so the girl that thinks about stepping in front of public transportation doesn’t. Don’t be selfish.
3. When you will yourself to sleep and it doesn’t come- get up. It doesn’t matter that it’s 3 am. There will be other 3 am’s. Take a shower. Take two. Wash him out of your hair. Write a poem. Read the same book you’ve read 202 times again. The 203rd time might tell you something different. Don’t stay in bed- you will think about the bus again.
4. Don’t kiss him because he’s broken. Don’t kiss him because his laughter never reaches his eyes. Don’t try and fix him. Fix yourself first. Be selfish. He can’t save you.
5. Date yourself. Take yourself out to eat. Don’t share your popcorn at the movies with anyone. Stroll around an art museum alone. Fall in love with canvases. Fall in love with yourself.
6. Dress up and wear red lipstick and get drunk with your friends. They’re the ones that will pick you up. Don’t kiss him. Or him. Don’t fall asleep on strange couches with strange boys. When his hand slides up your dress walk away. Hit him. Don’t kiss him. He can’t save you.
7. Get another tattoo. Get five more. Get another hole in your ear. Don’t listen to your dad. You will still be able to get a job. Did you really want to be employed by someone like your father? Haven’t you had enough of judgmental old white men anyway? Get fuck you tattooed in tiny letters on your hip.
8. When you feel the yearning for a new city- start over. Take 200 bucks and a three suitcases. Work anywhere that will have you. Meet strange people and forget your name. Call yourself Ruby. No one will know the difference. Remember to call your mother. Don’t be selfish. Come home when you find yourself in the strangers and the small one bedroom apartment.
9. Don’t whisper evil things into your own ear. Other people are going to shout them at you. Be your own hero. Keep a sword on your key ring.
10. Don’t step in front of a city bus. It will not be beautiful. Live. Stay up all night with a boy that promises you everything and means it. Live. See shitty local bands with a friend. Wear a different band’s t-shirt. No one will care. Live. Have a baby girl with tiny fingers and tiny toes someday. Pour love into her until it’s overflowing. Live. Wake up. Staying in bed all day is not poetic.
Live. Live.
Live.
Do you hear that? It’s me. It’s your life. Wake up.”

oops.

This post was edited by Kath on Jan 16 2014 06:39pm

Today, i'm getting over my cold
but ofc
my period came yesterday
iso jan 25
so it iwll be over wtih lol

i hate being allirritable and bitchy and what not.