Dont slander my post very rude. There is romance in it. Then followed by dramatic ending. It's long, funny, and romantic.

Nothing of yours is romantic, unless you find ladder slasher romantic, in that case I just feel sorry for u

This post was edited by Pick on Dec 28 2019 03:22pm

every Christmas eve its me and my wife
the kids and the family staying up thru the night
baking cookies and goodies
maybe some football a few tackles on tv
hot chocolate and laughs flipping thru channels
taking it easy
wrapping up presents and singing to songs
before we go to bed were sure to set the alarms
the new year is approaching the chimney is smoking
I hope everyone has many gifts to open

Twas the night before Christmas dreary, while I lurked, weak and weary,
I lurked many a jsp thread, most filled with tales of bore,
Then I happened upon your thread, which filled me with dread --
Giveaway, it said, which implied you'll be here no more --
Indeed, you did say you'll be here no more.
Gone forevermore!

"Oh my God, no! Please don't leave us, WinSomeDoh!"
I cried and cried all night long.
"Please tell me it ain't so! I'll miss you, WinSomeDoh!
Please, please, oh, tell me I'm wrong
About you moving down life's path along!
No more playing all night long!"

Out the door I ran - I now a broken-hearted man -
I ran into a candy cane garden in the middle of nowhere.
Deep in my thoughts dark, I pondered while walking in the park,
Suddenly a tornado shark cut through the Christmasy square!
I screamed, quivering with disbelief and fear.
"What am I doing here!"

I thought to myself, staring in disbelief
At that huge fish, something I've never seen before.
I thought, "Oh dear, how I wish WinSomeDoh were here!
Then this would bear much less weight on my shoulders sore!"
I ran back to my home and flung open the door -
Darkness in my room and nothing more.

Into the room I stumbled, while to myself I mumbled,
Until I tripped on a gift box and crashed onto the floor!
"Ouch!" I cried, the pain so bad I wish I died,
Until I spied something on my laptop o'er,
My laptop screen shining on my desk o'er,
Something I hadn't noticed before.

Toward my laptop I pulled, the pain in my leg now dulled.
Now something new in WinSomeDoh's thread I did see!
"Hmm," I thought, "Now with some afterthought
Maybe I shoulda fought a bit harder to guarantee
That WinSomeDoh will never leave me!"
I hoped he would agree.

That tiny little clue I saw in his thread - woo!
It was gonna help win my love back once more!
"Please don't go! I'll forever love you, WinSomeDoh!
You are my beau! You held my heart like never before!
I love you even more than Thor!
Please don't go outta the door!"

Please don't judge me!

This post was edited by pwb3 on Dec 29 2019 04:25pm

Oof and pwb3’s edit removes his story from contention.

Twas the night before Christmas dreary, while I lurked, weak and weary,
I lurked many a jsp thread, most filled with tales of bore,
Then I happened upon your thread, which filled me with dread --
Giveaway, it said, which implied you'll be here no more --
Indeed, you did say you'll be here no more.
Gone forevermore!

"Oh my God, no! Please don't leave us, WinSomeDoh!"
I cried and cried all night long.
"Please tell me it ain't so! I'll miss you, WinSomeDoh!
Please, please, oh, tell me I'm wrong
About you moving down life's path along!
No more playing all night long!"

Out the door I ran - I now a broken-hearted man -
I ran into a candy cane garden in the middle of nowhere.
Deep in my thoughts dark, I pondered while walking in the park,
Suddenly a tornado shark cut through the Christmasy square!
I screamed, quivering with disbelief and fear.
"What am I doing here!"

I thought to myself, staring in disbelief
At that huge fish, something I've never seen before.
I thought, "Oh dear, how I wish WinSomeDoh were here!
Then this would bear much less weight on my shoulders sore!"
I ran back to my home and flung open the door -
Darkness in my room and nothing more.

Into the room I stumbled, while to myself I mumbled,
Until I tripped on a gift box and crashed onto the floor!
"Ouch!" I cried, the pain so bad I wish I died,
Until I spied something on my laptop o'er,
My laptop screen shining on my desk o'er,
Something I hadn't noticed before.

Toward my laptop I pulled, the pain in my leg now dulled.
Now something new in WinSomeDoh's thread I did see!
"Hmm," I thought, "Now with some afterthought
Maybe I shoulda fought a bit harder to guarantee
That WinSomeDoh will never leave me!"
I hoped he would agree.

That tiny little clue I saw in his thread - woo!
It was gonna help win my love back once more!
"Please don't go! I'll forever love you, WinSomeDoh!
You are my beau! You held my heart like never before!
I love you even more than Thor!
Please don't go outta the door!"

If I win give it to the author

Best one I’ve read here. Ticks all the rules imo....