Deep in the forest where the tall pines stand,
Bigfoot was roaming through his shadowy land.
His footprints thudded, his howl shook the trees,
Creatures all scattered in the cold mountain breeze.
He thought he was king of the wild and the night,
A legend, a mystery, a towering sight.
But one dusty trail on a quiet back road
Brought him face to face with a man in a mode.
A cowboy hat tilted, a calm steady stare,
Chuck Norris stood casually breathing the air.
Bigfoot growled loudly, beat fists on his chest,
Certain this stranger would fail every test.
He charged like thunder through leaves and through rock,
But Chuck didn’t move… he just checked his watch.
One roundhouse kick like a flash in the sky,
The forest went silent, the birds wouldn’t fly.
Bigfoot flew backward through bushes and logs,
Startling the owls and confusing the frogs.
Now somewhere in woods when the cold winds blow,
Bigfoot walks softly, a little more slow.
And carved on a tree where the tall pines grow:
“Don’t mess with Chuck Norris.”