Quote (Ep0ch @ Aug 19 2017 10:28am)
Polly want a cracker for his parroting?
100+ reason the Princess Bride sucked, burden of proof is on you to debunk them.
0:21 Little kid has asthma cliche
0:39 Orgy of evidence that this is a kid's bedroom
0:39 What Mom gives Cheetos to a sick kid? Especially in the '80s. There should have been Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup and a can of 7-Up/Sprite there!
0:39 Also, (underneath the lamp to Fred Savage's right) is that a photo of a scantily clad girl out in plain view for his mother to see? I don't care how covered up or not she is, you kept that stuff hidden during the '80s.
1:05 No child of the '80s had a picture of a 10 speed bicycle on their wall. Especially when you compare that to how the rest of the room is decorated. I could understand a BMX bike, but not a 10 speed.
1:11 Maybe he won't, but then he does cliche.
1:30 Grandfather is a dick to sick kids.
1:36 And, we had to go up hill...both ways...in the snow...just to get to the library!
1:45 So, why isn't the sick kid's dad here to read the book to him? The movie will never explain this.
1:55 Since when are torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love and miracles considered 'sports?' I want to see THOSE Olympics!
2:05 Kid is a dick to Grandfather who's just trying to be nice.
2:17 Roll Credits!
2:34 Buttercup is a dick to farmboys.
4:19 What's a kissing book? It's like the writer thought, "How can I get more lines for Fred Savage to say....what would a kid say here?"
4:23 Fred Savage says what the audience is thinking
4:28 Doesn't he earn a living wage working at the farm? Or, are you telling me he's been working there for free this whole time? Is he a slave?
5:03 First love is always true love cliche.
5:24 Narrator casually references a story more interesting than anything we've seen on screen thus far.
5:38 That seems like an overreaction.
6:18 Member of Royalty marries a commoner cliche.
8:16ish He's just NOW explaining his plan to his henchmen? Seems like he would've done this before unless this is just for the audience's benefit. I bet that's it.
8:20 Fesig even refers to Viccini having spoken of the plan to them before because he says "You never said anything about killing anyone."
8:35 You must be going mad...because he clearly said the word "think."
8:44 That's racist.
9:07 Are there ample opportunities for employment in Greenland?
11:13 Because eels have a habit of jumping out of the water onto the boats?
11:59 Why would she believe this? You already said you were going to kill her, even when she was awake and within earshot.
12:12 Oh yeah...Fred Savage and that other guy are in this movie!
12:28 While not directly synonyms in the Thesaurus, Nervous and Concerned share many synonyms.
12:43 Fred Savage would be good at CinemaSins.
13:18 How would she consider herself brave? Sure, she jumped out trying to escape. But, then stopped when she heard the first shrieking. Then was tempted by an offer of compassion from someone she KNOWS wants to kill her....then FROZE as an eel charged right at her not even trying to defend herself. So, how is this considered brave?
13:22 That seems like a very exaggerated pose designed to say one thing, "Look at my crotch!"
14:31 Previous boat has conveniently moved out of the way so that Westley can dock.
15:00 If you want him to climb faster, have the camera go back to a wide shot...seriously, he was climbing a lot faster then.
15:08 Super smart guy does not understand the difference between an excuse and a fact.
16:20 In no way does this resemble the terrain we saw Westley climbing through in the previous wide shot.
16:33 Inigo says what the audience has been thinking every time Viccini says "Inconceivable."
16:38 Thanks, Captain Obvious!
17:12 That's racist.
18:27 That's racist.
19:29 Dust that was on Westley's left sleeve in the previous shot is magically gone.
20:31 How do you slash through the heart? Wouldn't it have to have been more of a stabbing motion? I guess you could slash through the heart...but, that would require slashing most of his torso off...so, why not just say that? Oh, this is supposed to be a kids movie. We can't say that. Carry on.
20:37 Naturally.
22:00 One sin off for the sword fight. Although I shudder to think at the remake that's surely being thought of and the Pirates of the Carribbean like bullshit that would be coming to this fight.
23:47 Westley does not land close enough to the sword to simply take it out of the ground like he does.
25:21 Insert joke about WWE style wrestling here
26:11 The rock that Westley is rolling Fesig towards in the previous shot has now moved farther away because it was afraid of being crushed.
29:25 Which is also why you're not going to chase the loser? It's not like he could come back one day to assemble a team of people to break into your castle or anything. That would be inconceivable!
29:39 How do we make this guy look more like an asshole? Let's put some apples on the makeshift table next to the wine!
29:39 Also, if you knew you were being chased...why on earth would you take the time to set up a little picnic for two?
29:42/30:42 Viccini pours the wine into the goblets, but we clearly saw him take a drink of wine earlier.
31:01 That's a perfectly convenient substance for this battle of wits! Good thing he didn't forget to pack that when he went on this trip!
33:15 Westley falls for this.
34:30 Inconceivable!
34:48 You seem like you already know what's going on....there's no way...nah, he couldn't have been a part of this...he's the prince!
35:13 That's sexist.
35:33 That's not what she said. She didn't say she didn't love him. She said he wasn't her dearest love.
35:54 Are there penalties for treating farmboys like slaves?
37:06 If you'd studied his eyes that much to be able to describe them like that...how could you possibly NOT know that this is Westley? Not to mention he's doing absolutely nothing to disguise his voice, it's not like he has a Bane mask on.
37:18 Westley is a dick to the girl he loves.
37:25 One sin off...that line should be on a bumper sticker!
38:43 Well, you finally figured it out just after you killed him. Time to do some Romeo and Juliet bullshit here.
39:30 And now, we will fast forward 3 months so that the characters can recover from broken backs.
40:06 Oh yeah, Fred Savage and that other guy are still in this! And, again...soup and sprite when you're sick!
40:22 Orange juice with a sandwich?
43:06 Even Dread Pirates aren't immune to the power of someone else's true love.
44:59 These vines are apparently as unbreakable as the snakes in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.
46:00 I guess it all depends on how you define success.
46:23 I don't think they exist and then they do cliche...not only that, but you JUST SAW TWO OF THEM MOMENTS AGO!
46:37 Good thing he can fence with his left hand, too!
47:56 Great! You killed one...now what about the other two? Was that one the Alpha and now you're the king of the ROUSs?
49:40 Buttercup must weigh about 10lbs.
50:21 Why does this enrage him enough to knock out Westley? Wouldn't he at least want to ask him who? It's also forgotten when you get to the torture scene later. Did he just pull a Kylo Ren?
52:43 Oh good...Fred Savage and the other guy are still with us!
53:06 The Princess Bride 2...Fred Savage writes angry YouTube comments telling everyone they got it wrong.
53:21 Ok, this pronoun game is confusing. Are both "hers" referring to Buttercup? Because if they do, did the King get it on with Buttercup? Because I'd be ok with that, and I am not ok with that.
54:27 Good thing that was a dream, or that old lady would find herself in the Pit of Despair.
55:50 Is this an island nation? Pretty sure at least one of those directions would beach the boat.
56:57 Is that really a pit? Seems more like a secret cave or something to me.
57:43 When would he have discovered this? You haven't done anything to him yet except try to heal him.
58:38 Bet you didn't know that vacuum cleaners used to be as big as an entire house, did you?
1:00:28 Ruling the world? You've already established that there's at least one other country out there.
1:01:07 When did Viccini ever tell you this?
1:02:12 Even Fesig knows you give someone soup when they're sick!
1:02:27 How did Fesig know about the 6 fingered man?
1:03:47 The motions he's making and the angle of the blade will not sharpen this knife.
1:05:20 The power of boners must be REALLY strong!
1:05:32 You are already planning on killing her. So, why the outrage? Shouldn't it just be smug contempt?
1:08:24 This works. (Also, pretty sure that's not the same knot they hit before to enter)
1:08:49 Oh thank god! They are STILL in this movie. I was getting worried.
1:09:15 Grandpa is a dick to kid by spoiling the ending.
1:09:20 Well, that all depends on how you define winning.
1:12:51 Did he just seriously compare true love to a MLT sandwich? Now, if it had been a BLT, maybe I could agree with him.
1:13:14 Witch and wife are not mutually exclusive.
1:15:37 Thank god Inigo is here to sum up the plot you missed while you took that nap.
1:16:01 None of the 60 guards see or hear them.
1:16:20 This is not the position his head was in just a second ago.
1:16:39 Because they didn't know about that one famous castle onslaught where a wheelbarrow was the deciding key to victory.
1:16:47 Cloak ex machina!
1:17:25 None of the 60 men guarding the gate see this.
1:20:56 Sounds like you must be doing something wrong, then.
1:25:07 Insert boob joke here
1:25:41 Well, that depends on how you define winning.
1:27:41 Plus, you never consummated the marriage, am I right?
1:31:36 Did they kill ALL the castle guards? Surely there must still be some. Wouldn't this conversation be more appropriate after they've actually escaped the castle?
1:32:07 Let's give these guys some more screen time.
Possible Outtakes:
4:08 Lion King intro song during sunset kissing scene.
4:57ish Buttercup asks, "What if something happens to you?" Answer: (from Team America) "I promise, I will never die."
During the scene with the eels, play the Jaws theme
22:52 Inigo says "Who are you?" Answer: "I'm Batman."
At some point during the battle of wits, you should put in the insuricare speech or something from The Incredibles.
34:24 After she asks who are you and he responds...play the audio from (can't believe I'm saying this) Green Lantern where whats-her-face asks Ryan Reynolds if he really didn't think she wouldn't recognize him because his cheek bones were hidden.
40:37 After Westley turns and points up the hill, show Gandalf riding down the hill with the horse army from The Two Towers.
46:00 After Buttercup says "We'll never succeed." Use the audio from Captain Pike from Star Trek saying "Well, that depends on how you define winning. You're here, aren't you?"
48:02 After Westley kills the ROUS and looks back at Buttercup, I want to say it's Bill Engvall, but he's got a comedy sketch where he uses the phrase "Let's not reeeeeeally make this man mad." (edit: Bill Engvall: Here's Your Sign, track name: Baby Barf and the Turkey Hunt, about 2:14 into the track)
53:50 When you see the old lady booing Buttercup. I can't remember which Austin Powers movie it is...but "Mole"
1:01:51 After Inigo says "It's you." "Hodor"
1:06.30 While Westley is screaming pan out further like when Kirk yells "Khan" in Star Trek II. Or, have Westley yell Khan, either way or both!
1:14:09 After she says "The chocolate coating makes it go down easier" play "A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down" from Mary Poppins.
1:20:06 After Humperdink says "Skip to the end" play the audio from the wedding in Spaceballs where the priest says, "OK, we're going to do the short, short version."
This post was edited by card_sultan on Aug 19 2017 02:34pm