Bahhahahaa some haalrious posts in here!m keep them up ty

ty

Yo mumma so stupid she sold her car for petrol

Yo mumma so stupid she invented a silent car alarm

Yo mumma so stupid she thought cheerios were donut seeds

Yo mumma so ugly she make michael jackson lok like brad pitt

Yo mumma so ugly she looked out the window and was arrested for indecent exposure

Yo mumma so ugly they push her face into the dough mix when making monster cookies

Yo mumma so ugly instead of round her ankles they put the bungee cord around her neck

Yo mumma so ugly that blind men refuse to have sex with her

Yo mumma so fat she went on a seafood diet and whenver she saw food she ate it

Yo mumma so fat, people excersice by jogging around her

Yo mumma so fat small objects orbit her

some good jokes in here



lol

ikr

I recall my first time with a condom, I was 16 or so. I went in to buy a packet of condoms at the pharmacy. There was this beautiful woman behind the counter, and she could see that I was new to it. She handed me the package and asked me if I knew how to use one.

I honestly answered “No this is my first time”.
So she opened the packet, took one out and rolled it over her thumb. She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure. I apparently still looked confused. So she looked all around the store to see if it was empty. It was.

“Just a minute” she said, and walked to the door, and locked it. Taking my hand she led me into the back room, she then unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked her bra and put it aside. “do these excite you?” she asked. Well I was so dumb struck that all I could do was nod my head. She then said it was time to slip the condom on. As I was slipping it on, she took off her skirt and panties and laid down on the desk. “well, come on” she said “we don’t have much time”.
So I climbed on her. It was wonderful, but unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW, I was done within a few minutes.
She looked at me with a bit of a frown. “did you put that condom on?” she asked. I said “I sure did” and held my thumb up to show her.

She fainted.

An Alsatian went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote, “Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof.”
The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog: “There are only nine words here. You could send another ‘Woof’ for the same price.”
“But,” the dog replied, “that would make no sense at all.”

A turtle was walking down an alley in New York when he was mugged by a gang of snails. A police detective came to investigate and asked the turtle if he could explain what happened.
The turtle looked at the detective with a confused look on his face and replied “I don't know, it all happened so fast.”