Fall.

Brick by Brick my wall is breaking.
Lie upon Lie my secrets are waking.
Tear after Tear my heart is still aching.
Move to Move my hands are shaking.
Thought by Thought I am faking...
No longer can I hold these emotions so torn.
A boy who wishes he was never born.
Love once here is now scorn.
I run to a place that seems so foreign.
The reasons this came to be seem to pile.
I hate myself all the while.
In my mind I search each aisle.
I cant seem to find that certain file.
I begin to cry.
I begin to shake.
This mind so frail begins to break.
I try to move.
I try to fly.
A spirit this damaged doesnt go high.
I start to crouch.
I start to call.
This body so weak I begin to fall.

I Am Me

I am Me
That's all I can be
I am tired of standards and the norm
Tired of feeling like a clown waiting to perform
I am miserable and sad at times
Afraid to show the real me or what's behind
I am open-minded and free
accepting of people and who they want to be
I am able to pass no judgement on someones choices
Being judged in my own life I know of its poison
I am happy and joyful sometimes
eager to search the world and see what I can find
I am ready to show the real me
Anticipating marching to my own beat
I am the creator of my destiny
I am Me



Alone
No entrance, trespassing is not an option
the exit is marked, proceed with caution
Get out I say, I want to be alone
To sit and wander into the unknown
I want to avoid contact
I want to evade light
Just let me be with me
My thoughts, my dreams, my needs
No entrance, trespassing is not an option
the exit is marked, leave now without caution.





Confusion

I'm a good person
I don't cheat, steal, rarely lie
Yet I'm cursed to be different
Why?
Maybe I'm not as good as I want to believe
I must have done something to have this dark cloud hang over my shoulder
But what?
It had to be bad to warrant this punishment
Enduring an emotional roller coaster on daily basis is rather harsh
But the punishment must fit the crime right?
Life is great and enjoyable except for this silent hex
Everything happens for a reason
Or does it?
An odious affliction for which there is no cure
But why?
I'm a good person.



Friends
We've made so many memories

We've had a lot of fun

It went so fast, the time flew by

It seems we've just begun!

Sometimes we couldn't stand each other

But that never lasted long

We had our share of fights, as well

But our friendship remained strong

You made me feel so important

Even when you waved hello

You made me laugh, you made me smile

So I thought I should let you know

You mean so much to me, my friend

You're a diamond in the rough

I don't know what I'd do without you

Who would I call when things were tough?

I know I can always count on you

And you can count on me

I've got your back no matter what

To you, With love, from me

I cry:Forbidden Love
The emotion of sadness runs through these veins like a rushing river.
I cry inside and speak not one ounce for it hurts even worse when i open this mouth.
I can barely stand it; The pain of unfullfilled desire burns as my ring of fire.
This love can never be; I cry knowing that you see me but not for what I want you to want me to be...
These eyes are like rushing waterfalls that never run dry. My hearts is not whole and in flames of desire.
My spirit is dissolving for this is a forbidden love to which there is no finding. I can no longer bottle this up inside because...I cry

My December Midnight

A fated midnight ever so bleak
In mid December midly meek
Pondering thoughts of days gone past
Peering through the Window last
I slouched in my chair, under a bust of Pallas
Fealing light, weary, and yet- Alas!
I see my actions from a past event
Falling from zenith- like God's Servant
From there I tire yet hear some tapping
Interupting my midnight napping
I cross the floor, to my bedroom Window
Only to lapse in a mystical meadow
Supinely lay, I open my eyes
To find the calculus of my demise
I see it all in a deep blue hue
Just before I glimpse, my short life's rue
Unconciously my mind stops dreaming
Suddenly my heart stops beating
My one last breathe at a seconds pace
I have no time left, and see God's face.


Untitled
What will I have to show when my life has ended
Or when my life is at a low, and anything but splendid
I went to school with saps, to get a fancy job
We threw up our caps, and began to sob
But when we found no fun, in the midst of this fray
When the righteous deeds done are seen a-stray
In this place where nice guys finish last
Morals we embrace thrown out so fast
Where am I going, I can only wonder.
My wounds, I'm sewing, my life in sunder.
And when I pass, will anyone remember
Once I'm in brass-- a six feet under member
But I can now see the gates-ever so pearly
When Saint Peter states, "You're here-- so early?!"
I say,"Phil V, reporting here"
"It saddens me", replys his leer
"To see you unflegded, and your life so right;
Let all those who dredged, know you put up a fight"
At this I pondered, if I'll be granted entry
Would back when I flaundered, be the blocking sentry?
"Give me a sec", as he looks through his book
I am but a spec, feeling ill from his look
"Ah here" quote the saint, with a smile on his face
"You may enter the gate, all covered in lace."
And now I see, what life is for
To gain entry, to that golden street floor