I'm working on two different stories with the dream and aim of one day becoming published. This is the beginning to one and I'd appreciate if you guys could read it and let me know what you think. Feedback is always appreciated, even if it is harsh
Waiting is never easy. Especially for someone like Dex, who sat on the cold stone floor with his legs crossed, his eyes closed and his breathing steady. Outwardly he appeared calm and composed, a statue in the dimness of the cube shaped room. He knew that he was being watched, that his calm demeanour was being noted and his physical appearance weighed. But what couldn't be seen, what he wouldn't allow the others to see, was the burning anger he felt inside. The hopelessness of his situation that allowed him only one thing to hold onto. Destruction. It was, after all, his nature.
"Why do you just sit there like that?" asked Bull, his name a pretty accurate indication of the man himself. He was large, barrel chested and had an ugly flat nose. His eyes held very little intelligence and just a little cunning. Supposedly he was in the cell for murder, a charge which he denied. Dex didn't understand why the majority of men he'd met in the cells denied their crimes. They could always explain things away, their reasons and the culmination of accidents that led to them being imprisoned. If a man was ever to learn from his mistakes then he needed to accept them.
As was usual for Dex he ignored any words directed at him. He had long ago lost the will to talk. How many months had he been in the cells? Maybe close to a year? A year in which he fought every other day for survival. It was getting harder and harder to survive; the games were becoming more and more elaborate and deadly. It wasn't even possible for him to count the lives he had taken and usually he wouldn’t think about it. But when he did, the best answer he could come up with was "lots".
"He does what we should do," said the newest prisoner. Dex had seen him once, he recalled. Fairly tall yet not as tall as himself, the man was covered in tattoos and had midnight black skin, hair that was plated and fell down below his shoulders. A pirate. His name was Jhat.
"And what does that mean?" asked Bull.
Dex almost felt Jhat shrug. It was amazing how he could picture the room and everyone inside it so clearly, all their mannerisms and how they would act.
"He fights two battles," said Jhat. "One out in the arena," and he tapped at his head. "And one in here. It is only a matter of time before he loses one. When he does it will be the end of him."
Dex almost laughed hysterically. The pirate thought he knew so much, he didn't. He wasn't fighting a battle for his sanity, that was a battle lost long ago. No, what he did was live in a different world, a different time. Within his built up world he could experience all the things he had once had, emotions of happiness and contentment. And who is to say which is more real? Whether dreams and the imaginings in the mind are any less important than those that manifest themselves physically? What is love, if not a notion built up in the imagination?
"How old do you think he is?" asked Slug.
There was a moment of silence in which no one spoke. Dex could have answered for them, but part of his amusement came from listening to their chatter, as annoying as it could be sometimes.
"He is Nineteen," whispered Alan. It was so low that Dex thought himself the only one able to hear it.
"Speak up, man," said Bull gruffly. "Did you say Nineteen? I don't believe it! Look at him! He must be older. What makes you think he is Nineteen?"
There was a scuffle of sound as someone moved across the room, and then Dex felt the warmth of breath on his cheek. "I know he is nineteen," said Alan gently. "Because I knew his parents. I looked after him when he was young, for a while. You could call me a family friend, except that Dex is now the only one left of his family. Isn't that right, Dex?"
Dex felt the warmth of the man at his side. It would have been so easy for him to reach out and extinguish his fragile life. It might even be a mercy. Alan hadn't been in the cells long, just over a week. And yet he had fought and survived three times already. An accomplishment for someone so slight and timid.
When it became clear that he wasn't going to answer, Alan scuttled back to his place across the other side of the room. None of the men would attack him, or each other. After all they were a team, of sorts. Dex had been a part of dozens of similar teams during the last year. When they looked at him and weighed, it was their own short futures they were gauging. Of them all he was the only one able to stand against the Criado in single combat. That was his role out in the Arena, to fight in single combat while the others warded off the beasts. If he died, then so would the others. If they died... it would just make it a little harder for him, that was all.
Alan had spoken truly. He remembered his childhood, the well-spoken Ral who tutored him, taught him numbers and letters. A free man, one of the few free Ral in the Empire. In truth he had been a family friend, as dubious as that sounded. Not all Criado were alike, yet they were mostly similar. His family had been different, more open and free with their generosity. They hadn't treated their slaves as most Criado did. Oh, they had them. But they were treated well. Dex's father knew how to buy loyalty with a different coin other than intimidation. Everyone knew that any Criado could strike down a Ral with the ease of swatting an errant fly. So his father treated his slaves with the common respect he would offer any other Criado, nearly. Their choices were pretty much their own as long as they caused no trouble and completed their chores. At the height of the Andory house, the family of Andory had had over four thousand slaves. Soldiers, potters, blacksmiths, maids, brewers. Their family had been up and coming in the Great Council.
Until it all fell apart.If you managed to get this far, thanks for reading! Let me know what you think, if it's shit, or just mediocre.
Cheers.
This post was edited by slasheriam on Oct 18 2012 09:25pm