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Joined: Mar 23 2006
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Dec 5 2009 09:56pm
I wrote this a long time ago, and I found it recently. I think the symbolism is pretty straightforward, but if you have questions, ask. I'm curious as to if it's any good.

A cage so callous and cold
Trapped within the walls of mortality
Our beating hearts keep us prisoner
To an existance of contemptable emptiness

The prison walls demand of us light and warmth
The prison guards demand daily offerings of nourishment
And we comply -- for the prison has the ultimate defense
It makes us want to stay within it

Because outside of the prison yard is blackness -- the unknown
None, no matter what they say, know what is beyond the blackness
For if they did, and it was as divine as they imagine
They'd graciously bust open the cell doors

What is outside of the prison?
Maybe just blackness, maybe something unimaginable
Maybe severence pay for those who volunteered in the prison yard
Maybe just a transfer for those who mistreated their fellow inmates

Whatever is out there matters not
The inmate serving a life sentence does not worry about the outside
We are all in together
We should be taking care of one another
Until death sets us free
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Joined: Jul 10 2006
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Dec 6 2009 10:50pm
Interesting, unfortunately I don't know much about poetry.
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Dec 11 2009 11:35pm
Quote (jjarv @ Dec 5 2009 08:56pm)
I wrote this a long time ago, and I found it recently. I think the symbolism is pretty straightforward, but if you have questions, ask. I'm curious as to if it's any good.

A cage so callous and cold
Trapped within the walls of mortality
Our beating hearts keep us prisoner
To an existance of contemptable emptiness

The prison walls demand of us light and warmth
The prison guards demand daily offerings of nourishment
And we comply -- for the prison has the ultimate defense
It makes us want to stay within it

Because outside of the prison yard is blackness -- the unknown
None, no matter what they say, know what is beyond the blackness
For if they did, and it was as divine as they imagine
They'd graciously bust open the cell doors

What is outside of the prison?
Maybe just blackness, maybe something unimaginable
Maybe severence pay for those who volunteered in the prison yard
Maybe just a transfer for those who mistreated their fellow inmates

Whatever is out there matters not
The inmate serving a life sentence does not worry about the outside
We are all in together
We should be taking care of one another
Until death sets us free


No rhyme scheme, 1-line clause ends, and i typically dislike free poetry. But it carries a powerful message :)
I Like it.
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