*
if you play a role long enough, and really commit, does it ever become real? could i... become real?
my life has always felt like an unanswered question.
a string of days and nights. waiting for something to happen
wherever i am, were some how connected, i can feel you, with me
your what makes me real. and i never wanna go a day without you
because something as simple as seeing you smile, is the highlight of my week
you, your part of me, a part im not willing to let go of.
and im going to hang onto you for deal life.
please. say yes. say you'll be with me.
most actors toil in obscurity, never stepping into the spotlight.
but if you hone your craft. work diligently. you might just find yourself cast, in the role of a lifetime...
*
the only thing you can count on in a changing world,
is change itself. yesterdsays truths become todays lies.
hope, dreams, love and life are just convienent illusions.
to love is to be hurt, to be hurt is pain, which is all i know.
but even in my desperate mind, i still choose pain,
because besides pain, i know nothing at all.
*
If I didn't care,I think I could be happy.
If I didn't think,everything would become clear.
The poison flows through my veins,keeping me awake.
The ashes fall from my eyes.Nothing is worth waiting for.
Everything is strange & everyone is a stranger.
My past is written in blood & the future is composed of false hope.
All we have is nothing.Aspire to let go & forget everything you know.
If I didn't care,you wouldn't be reading these words.
*
There's nothing left to feel except the dirt between my toes.
The Earth filling my lungs,compressing my chest,I'll bite my tongue.
You will never understand,so I won't even try.
There's no love lost,simply vengeance found.It's so quiet,I won't make a sound.
I can still hear you crying.You know I'll always stay here.
I may not care,but I'll continue to listen.
If I forget the meaning it'll make so much sense.
Although I'm dead,cold,alone & rotting.Life will never make sense.
Gravity seems so much stronger.I waste away,but still pray,this can't last much longer.
The skin dacays,flesh from bone.The seconds consist of days,you should've known.
You should've known your secrets would put me underground.
I fear that this will be forever.The living don't stand a chance.
While dying things,I cannot save.I'm too busy,filling my own grave.
*
Crimson red lips,tainted.Veins run dry,living alone is no way to die.
All the beauty she posessed spilled out onto the floor.
It's at that moment,she didn't feel like smiling,anymore.
You can see her thoughts,spread out against the wall.
I could have swore time stood still as I watched her fall.
Jesus died for this kind of thing.
*
Your smell is intoxicating.Your voice,sends a welcomed chill up my spine.
I'm just so damn alluring,you can't stand it.You hate me,I know.You're not alone.
We've left trails of broken hearts,we've fallen apart.This won't last long.
Everything has gone,they've moved on.I just keep losing myself in the sound.
You're just so damn smooth with your lips like morphine.Let's catch up,how have you been?
Second thoughts?No time to talk,he's bound to come home soon.
The sheets don't lie,the floor is a far better setting for this particular scenario.
No formalities nessesary,I'll catch your name on the mailbox on my way out.
*
Here are a few,simple,words.The letters dance on my fingertips,composing a meaningless message.
I try reluctantly to decipher this,but my mind stumbles over self-loathing & logic along the way.
There are far too many things I shouldn't say;take this for example.So many things not to say.
I should divide my time into life & death,I'll get busy living as soon as I finish dying.I'm terribly busy.
Here I am,wasting some of your time,but all of mine.I apologize for the preceding & what you are reading.
I'll try to make this mess concise to to whatever point I'm trying to get across.
*
Take seven steps back & 10 deep breaths.This will all be over soon.
Your story was riddled with holes.My words will always be laced with lies.
Your eyes will always scream everything you couldn't comprehend feeling.
I can't speak to you tonight.Hell,I can hardly look at your face.
And tomorrow,tomorrow yesterday will be forgotten.
If you still care,don't ever let me know.
If you stole all my words,I'd say they meant nothing at all.
*
As I begin my decent towards the ground I never heard you make a sound
No words shared between the sky & the cold, unforgiving pavement
Such a calm scene until the sirens showed
The rain came down so hard that night
The clouds blocked the only light left in this town
As I fell, your eyes never looked away
Staring me in the face, did you care at all?
Or were you just too delighted to see me fall?
I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt
Sure the impact may have shattered my bones
But the fact that you pushed me hurt a bit more
I will take your words to the grave
And your smile is one that I will save
I take it we're over?
*
This is the kind of place where hope comes to die
Angels are ripped from above & lose all their faith to fly
You call this Hell but I call it home, happines is something I've never really known
It's a long way down from where I stand, God damn, it's gonna hurt when I land
Let's end this in tragedy, after all, nobody profits from a disaster
If only I could hate you, just half as much as I hate myself
How do you feel when your so damn cold? Hating myself is beginning to get a little old
And now I'm covinced, that there has to be so much more than this
There has to be a way to make the pain go away & to be fine again, one day
I'm weaker now & once again I've failed you, once again I've lost faith in life
This is the kind of place where hope comes to die
But it's so beautiful, like fire against the evening sky
It's beginning to seem like God's forgotten my fucking name
And the world has lost all it's color, just shades of gray, it's all the same
Now, I'm starting to feel it, I'm dying & there's no point in trying to fix me
I'm a lost cause, the best I can do is to try and hide my flaws
One day I'll be to late, one day I'll wake up and it'll just be too late
But I'm not scared now, no, everything's gonna be just fine without me
Everyone's gonna be just fine, without me
*
He prays to God she doesn't have the nerve
She's got the gun in hand and the hatred fills her eyes
She's got one bullet, & he's got one too many mistakes under his belt
He tells her he's sorry, he begs and he pleads
But tonight, she's not gonna be the one who bleeds
Such a sad end to a beautiful beginning
The shot rang throughout her mind
The sound of freedom, the sound of love's truest form
His blood ran across the kitchen floor
And his eyes left wide open & in that instant
She saw the man she fell in love with
*
Words just don't mean what they used to.I'll sew my lips shut.
I won't say another word.Forget what you've heard.It meant nothing.
My thoughts stay concealed in my mind where they belong.
Trapped,like the fireflies we caught as kids.Memories are exactly that,memories.
Smiles come & they go.Laughter ends just as often as it begins.
The only thing that stays constant,is friends.If you're lucky,that is.
*
With every word you speak, with every song you sing I fall harder for you
Your laugh is the morphine I need to get by day to day
Your smile is like the Sun, sheding light upon my world
Your eyes are like the ocean & I can get lost forever
Hold my hand & help me to stand. You make me so strong
Just so you know, I've loved you all along
*
She's never looked so good, in the pale moon light
she whispers in my ear "This is the perfect night"
Her voice is my favorite song, so beautiful,
so bitter sweet & I don't want it to ever end
She's the kind of perfect a God could be jelous of,
she's the one I care about, the one I love
Her smile reminds me there's no reason to be sad
and she can make the worst of the worst seem not so bad
*
With a broken heart she sings, a song so sweet
with the words in my head I attempt to sweep her off her feet
We dance the night away and I've said all I could say
this is the perfect night to end the perfect day
We'll watch the sun rise but I'll be staring into her endless blue eyes, they captivate me so
My imperfections don't mean a thing to her
life before tonight was simply a blur
*
If I could finally do something of any siginifigance it would be to make every day unforgettable
And for every word to mean something more, for every step to take us somewhere new
She keeps my hands steady & my mind clear, she makes life tolerable, not something to fear
She can do so much better than me, but I'd be happy letting things be
If she's happy & has a smile on her face, then I will simply embrace her endless grace