You don't have a guess as to what I was trying to do with a clear overuse of elaborate vocabulary?

not a clue. it seems very pointless to me.

The point is that the main character things to much and eventually goes insane through his constant stream of consciousness.

Does anyone like the story itself, or are you too distracted by the grammar to enjoy it?

look, please don't take it the wrong way. he may think too much but be realistic. who thinks using so many fancy words? and the vocabulary is what's distracting to me not the grammar. It's interesting but I can't enjoy. too tedious to read.

Ok now you are misunderstanding me. I never said that the vocabulary (or for that matter the grammar) was hard to read at all. It's just tedious. like I said it seems pointless and slightly annoying to have to chew your way through an excess of unnecessary word usage when you can get your point across in a much simpler and to the point manner

it contributes to "getting to know the character" ... from his vocabulary we can assume he was a intellectual person

maybe

I re-read it again and it was very simple for me to read it, perhaps the Twilight series is not the standard we should hold literature to?

adding insult to injury huh. well apparently you're still not getting my point. If you want a good example of books that use plenty of nice vocabulary without it being tedious you should read something like midnight tides, Stranger in a Strange Land, or even Dune. Hell I've even read Dante's Inferno and it isn't so damned tedious. vocabulary isn't the issue. The issue is how you used it. How many different ways must I put this?

I have a better idea. How about I just let it go because this is going nowhere and you can keep your story as is even though I'm not the only person who has said this. Good luck really. I'm bored of trying to give a little constructive criticism to closed off writers.

Sorry about the Twilight comment, it was uncalled for.

Seriously, you think my grammar usage was more tedious than Dante's Inferno? That book is incredibly hard to read because of the grammar and the context.

I respect your opinion and I consider it, but I haven't seen anyone who read it in person point it out.