b/c poems arent autobiographies. if u wana vent, go write a diary. thats its own artform.
dont parade a diary in here as a poem. i mean it could be done but ur work is almost completely banal. any uneducated person can write wat u did. and they do. in diaries.

I'm sorry, but it's quite obvious you don't have much of a background with this stuff. Look at Edgar Allen Poe's stuff, or Emily Dickenson, or Mark Twain. A LOT of their writing is from their past experiences. And the fact that you can't spell worth a damn shows you probably don't write much of this stuff either.

I'll "Parade" this as a poem if I so choose. I made an attempt at writing, no need for some egotistical childish fool, who gets off to bashing posts on an internet forum, to attempt to tell me what poetry is. Poetry is an expressive art form.. which has many branches. Shakespeare wrote autobiographical poetry. I'd thank you to refrain from posting any more cynicism in my thread. I suggest you get over yourself champ.

Definition of Poetry:
Poetry is an imaginative awareness of experience expressed through meaning, sound, and rhythmic language choices so as to evoke an emotional response.

Also, in response to this..



I don't believe I even need to touch upon the ignorance of this statement. Apparently "uneducated" people enjoy posting in this thread as well.

This post was edited by mikeydubs5 on Jun 9 2009 10:17pm

Then don't post? Common sense.. not so common?

LOL the kids got like a fucking degree in literature
youre barely graduating highschool

oh and mikey, if you ask for feedback, dont get defensive when people dont think its good
as for eriot, i disagree. its a cute little poem that drags on far too long but as he said its nothing special. id go with a 5/10

This post was edited by Kamikizzle on Jun 10 2009 12:57pm

hahahaha wow.. I shouldn't even dignify you with a response. Learn math champ. I'm 21, in my third year of university, double majoring in biology and sport and excercise psychology. I'm a science guy, which is why I am not much of a writer. Graduated four years ago. Not everyone is on the 8 year plan there princess.

Anyways, he may have a degree in literature, but he doesn't even believe a poem can be autobiographical? He's not giving feedback, he's essentially calling me uneducated. To this, I take offense. Clearly he's got his own opinions on what poetry should be, which is fine, but it's simply ignorant to call people uneducated when they do not stretch to find words that wouldn't be considered banal, simply to BE original, as seems to be his approach. In my opinion flooding a poem with extensive vocabulary can come across the same way as a silly little peacock.. trying to flaunt it's feathers It's a folly I hope he overcomes. My originality comes from my own unique experiences, not the words I use to pass them on. Simply because something is not to his taste, does not mean the author is uneducated, nor that they do not deserve any respect, or that he should go around categorizing people in such a way. It's petty, and embarassing, and down right tasteless.

Also? I don't care at all if people don't like it. I would love constructive criticism, but I won't put up with some "English lit" kid with a chip on his shoulder, calling people uneducated simply because they choose not to strive for originality through their word selection. I also disagree with his comment that anyone could write what I wrote. No one else has had the exact same experience I have, hence, no one could write exactly what I wrote.
In my opinion, it's not the words chosen that bestow the message, it's the message itself. Encrust shit with gold, and it's still shit, and it's still going to stink. Present something exquisitly simple and present it as is, like a flower, and it can still be enthralling.

I am not saying my work is the latter, simply saying that is my APPROACH to such work, and I fully realize my work is sub par, it's the forst time I've put pen to pad to write anything besides a lab report etc. lol.

So. I wrote it mainly for myself, and some constructive criticism as I plan to put it to music soon, as I've recently started playing a couple of instruments.

P.S., to touch off in typical jsp fashion, I leave you with this;
Get off his nuts kamikizzle. Quit trollin' and try the new mmorpg, called real life.

This post was edited by mikeydubs5 on Jun 10 2009 08:13pm

Anyways, this is getting entirely off topic, and I'm done with this childish little e-war. I would love some constructive criticism from anyone willing to give it, IE Chronicbear, any suggestions? Feel free to pm them too, unfortunately I've lost a lot of respect for eRiot, and I would rather not hear his strongly opinionated banter here any more.

I fucking lol'd at the bold.

Explain? I've not been able to take any courses on literature or even been very interested in writing all that much because I tend to be more occupied with my current courseload and I'm busy coaching etc..

hey genius double major
i quoted cold and then went on to adress you. colds bday is 1991

and im SERIOUSLY not gonna read the entire novel youve left us with, but seriously. if you post your shit here, dont get butthurt if people dont like it

and how the fuck am i trolling?

This post was edited by Kamikizzle on Jun 10 2009 08:45pm