The Human mind
It can be such a fragile thing.
When the fears and the self-doubts assail you and your heart feels heavier than stone.
Then you weep for hate, anger, love, rage, and confusion till your mind and body are numb.
Your only comfort is blessed darkness.
When the whole world seems to be falling away as you balance on the edge of the world.
Your brain doesnt work.
All it does is trick and tease you.




The pain down deep
It twists in the pit of your stomach.
Eating at your soul.
We can never truly be free.
It hurts so bad you fear it will burst from you.
Pain, the only thing our mind will think of.
How can such a thing as this be felt.
Worse than torture.
We will never be free of it.
The memory remains.

leon i love you.......

emo shit

knock the spam off

ed i love you too.

no not emo shit. you dont even know what emo is and your only like 10 so you should wait around 8 years or so before you start throwing around your extensive knowledge.

vouch

even still, you don't really say much. and redundancy such as this "When the whole world seems to be falling away as you balance on the edge of the world." (saying "the world" like that) sort of hurts your point. Try to make new points at least every few lines or so. Illustrate your points. Try not to just say the same thing over again with different words.

Also, not to sound like an elementary english teacher, but concrete nouns are much more effective than abstract nouns.

Sounds like your just writing to look cool, though I didnt really see something between those empty words. Try to tell a story or something with your words, It will make interesting.

well i dont write to look cool. I dont write often but when i do it i do it for myself and no other reason. If ya do something ya gotta have critics so whatever. ive had more then a few people tell me it was good too.