My merc left me for Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris goes to the Arreat Summit, the Ancients act real still and hope he passes through.
Chuck Norris is so cool that it takes two potions to thaw Anya.
Larzuk goes to Chuck Norris for sockets.
Chuck Norris skips the Hellforge. He just crushes the soulstone with his bare hand.
Chuck Norris shits high runes and pisses purple rejuv.
Bremm Sparkfist, Listor the Tormentor, and Uber Meph go to group therapy for their fear of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a Horadric Cube. He just stares at the ingredients and and the shit transmutes itself.
Chuck Norris doesn't open locked chests. They explode when he walks by, and the gold flies into his pockets.
Chuck Norris's life bar goes off the screen to the right and wraps around the left side.
Andariel and Lilith get into catfights over Chuck Norris. He has sex with both of them while this is going on.
Chuck Norris can do a whirlwind and one-hit kill you with an empty inventory.
Chuck Norris carries a Tome of Asskickery.
Njaguar once tried to warn Chuck Norris, and the code rewrote itself to avoid angering him.
Baal has to kill Chuck Norris in Hell to beat the game. He can't even do it in Normal.