I can't figure out how other sonyas do so much more damage than me. whats the best way to build her? life regen?

I think whirlwind healing is her only efficient build right now.
I used to like the splash damage skill build.. but I'm pretty sure it's been changed a little bit.

thats what i was doing for a while. now it just doesnt seem as viable

splash build has always had the lowest win rate its on the same teir as focused attack which is much better for sonya

Sonya is more of a jungler than anything else...but now that Rexxar is out he does the same thing...just a lot better. Have you tried him?

you're not even answering the question lol

Go warcry into merc lord (1 and 4 talents) and just jungle/split.

Make sure you take wrath and not leap at level 10 so you can solo the boss easily...try taking a merc camp in a lane far from the boss and then nabbing the boss while the other team deals with that merc camp. Be smart and use your best judgement.

Hope that helps.