laten we mopjes vertellen mischien vinden we er nog wel grappige


ik zal beginne met een domme


er gaat een vis naar de dokter
de dokter zegt : ah ik zie het al. Uit de kom.

Two gay men decide to have a baby.

They mix their sperm together and have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated with it.

When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital.

A dozen babies are in the ward, eleven of whom are crying and screaming. Over in the corner, one baby is smiling serenely.

A nurse comes by, and to the delight of the gay fathers, she points out the happy child as theirs.

"Isn't it wonderful?" one gay says to the other.

"All these unhappy babies .... and yet our baby is so happy. This just proves the superiority of gay love!"

The nurse says, "Oh sure, he's happy now, but just watch what happens when I pull the thermometer out of his arse!"

A married man was having an affair with his secretary.

One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they made passionate love all afternoon. Exhausted from the wild sex, they fell asleep, awakening around eight PM. As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless complied. He slipped into his shoes and drove home.

"Where have you been!" demanded his wife when he entered the house.

"Darling, I can't lie to you. I've been having an affair with my secretary and we've been having sex all afternoon. I fell asleep and didn't wake up until eight o'clock."

The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, "You fucking lying bastard! You've been playing golf!"

This post was edited by Demonsangel on Aug 28 2008 10:26am

This virgin girl is on the phone and asks her boyfriend to come over and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time. Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. He tells the pharmacist it's his first time and the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex.

At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.

That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!"

The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head.

A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down.

10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.

Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."

The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist."

ROFL

Iets minder sarcastisch pls? :s

rofl?

Ik vond die laatste mooi haha, echt ^^

hoe maakt ge een hollander gek

zet hem in een ronde kamer en zeg dat er kaas in de hoek ligt

een van de beste stand up jokes die ik ken.

abnormaal londons accent, moeilijk verstaanbaar, maar nog te doen.
uitzien gewoon

rolling on floor laughing