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Aug 6 2016 05:20pm
Quote (Struyk @ 6 Aug 2016 15:20)
One day a man was waking along the beach when he tripped over a lamp. He turned around and kicked the lamp out of anger. A few seconds later, a genie popped out of the lamp.

Reluctantly, the genie said, "Even though you kicked me, I still have to give you three wishes. However, because of what you did, I will also give twice what you wish for to the person you hate the most: your boss."

So the man agreed and made his first wish. "I want lots of money", he said. Instantly 22 million dollars appeared in the man's bank account and 44 million appeared in his boss' account.

For his second wish, the man wished for a couple of sports cars. Instantly a Lambergini, Ferrari and Porsche appeared. At the same time two of each car appeared outside of his boss' house.

Finally the genie said, "This is your last wish, you should choose carefully," and to this the man replied, "I've always wanted to donate a kidney..."



Lol'd
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Aug 6 2016 08:07pm
A Doctor asked her patient for a sample of semen and gave him the sealed bottle. The man took it home and tried it with his right hand, then with his left, couldn't alone so he asked his wife, but tried it with both hands and failed. The man took it back empty to his doctor, and the doctor confused asked why it was empty. The man said "I couldn't get the lid to open"
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Aug 7 2016 08:49am
What's the difference between a blonde and an ironing board

The ironing boards legs are hard to open.
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Aug 7 2016 12:30pm
What are these codes for exactly?
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Aug 7 2016 12:37pm
Quote (Perseverance1 @ 7 Aug 2016 12:30)
What are these codes for exactly?



Pokemon trading card online booster packs

I'll be editing and pming packs when I get home
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Aug 7 2016 06:31pm
A little boy asked his dad how to impress this girl at school. the dad pulled his pants down and said
"you see this, this is the most perfect penis in the world".
The boy then went back to school and pulled the girl behind the bushes during recess and said
"you see this, if it was a bit shorter, it would have been the most perfect penis in the world".
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Aug 8 2016 04:29pm
Quote (Mangartist @ 7 Aug 2016 19:31)
A little boy asked his dad how to impress this girl at school. the dad pulled his pants down and said
"you see this, this is the most perfect penis in the world".
The boy then went back to school and pulled the girl behind the bushes during recess and said
"you see this, if it was a bit shorter, it would have been the most perfect penis in the world".


+33 Masonic

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Aug 13 2016 07:49pm
A kid was out on the porch with his grandpa and he saw his grandpa drinking a beer, the boy says hey grandpa can I have a sip of your beer? the grandfather asks the boy, does your dick touch your asshole? the boy says no and the grandfather says well then you cannot have a sip of my beer. Later on that day the little boy sees his grandpa smoking a cigarette, the boy asks hey grandpa can I have a puff of your cigarette? the grandpa replies, does your dick touch your asshole? they boy says no and the grandfather replies no then you cannot have a puff of my cigarette. The boy goes inside and goes back out onto the porch with a plate of cookies. The grandfather delighted by the sight of the cookies ask the boy if he can have one of his cookies. The boy asks his grandfather does your dick touch your asshole? Of course it does says the boys grandfather, then go fuck yourself :rofl:
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Aug 13 2016 09:04pm
Free joke as I don't play this game!

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?


















Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be called bagels!
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Aug 13 2016 09:28pm
Quote (Gala32 @ 13 Aug 2016 22:04)
Free joke as I don't play this game!

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?


















Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be called bagels!


Rotflmao
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