My name is Peter, and I have come all the way from Petersfield, England to see #SurvivorSeries. I have been a longtime fan of WWE, even if The Product has been stale garbage for the last few years (#BringBackPunk). I am sick of Vince McMahon, Kevin Dunn, and his other lackeys treating me like a moron with an insulting Product full of poorly written characters, misused international stars (Neville anyone?), and an overabundance of the worst wrestler of all time, Roman Reigns. I have decided to get my money's worth by letting them know how much Roman Reigns, and by proxy the Current Product, sucks.
That's where you lads come in.
We want The E to know Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins (though both also poorly booked — #TurnThemHeel) are okay in our books and that by bringing the Shield back, we don't magically love Roman. So here is what we do during their epic three on three confrontation against The New Day.
1. During their entrance, you may cheer, as there are more good members of The Shield than bad and we want to support the talented ones. However, if Roman walks by you, give him the middle finger or tell him he sucks. Do not physically attack him, even if you're like me and can take him — we need you in the crowd for the match!
2. When Seth or Dean is in the ring, chant "THIS IS WRESTLING" as loud as possible.
3. When Roman Reigns gets the tag, boo him so loud that he wants to die.
4. While Roman is in the ring, TURN YOUR BACKS TO THE RING and don't make a sound. Show them we can't even be bothered to hate him — we just don't care about him.
5. When Seth or Dean is tagged in (choose one mate in your group to regularly turn around and check if Roman will be tagging out soon — real fans can tell the signs), cheer as loudly as humanly possible.
6. If children are cheering for Roman, calmly explain to them why he is the least talented member of the Shield (talking points: stale, bad on the mic, overbooked, boring, dumb look, women only like him because he is "hot" [he is not imho), etc.). If they continue to cheer, tell nearby security guards that their parents have threatened your life and get them kicked out. (Note: key hints such as merchandise or conversations you overhear can help you get the jump on this part of the process before the match even begins)
7. If adults are cheering for Roman, see the above step but replace "their parents" with "they."
8. If Roman gets the pin, boo until you go hoarse.
9. If Seth or Dean gets the pin, cheer like animals. However, if Roman poses or taunts in your
direction, see Step 3.
10. If New Day pins Roman, cheer for them and perform the "New Day rocks" dance.
11. If New Day pins Seth or Dean, politely applaud.
12. If Roman is the last man in the ring, throw any garbage you have at him (snack containers, cups, trays, signed 8 x 10s of Roman that they probably force you to buy at the merch booth).
13. If you see Roman after the show, make sure you tell him you don't respect him and boo him.
If you follow these easy steps, Vince and Dunn will have no choice but to fire Roman on the spot. Good luck and enjoy the show!
LOL
Best part: If they continue to cheer, tell nearby security guards that their parents have threatened your life and get them kicked out
