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Oct 4 2009 02:48pm
Defense of the Ancients, or DotA, is a custom game for Warcraft 3 that is used to wean World of Warcraft addicts from their habit, but eventually becomes habit forming itself, similarly to how methadone was used to cure heroin addiction. Although DotA is one of the most popular games today, playing it is like rolling around in shit while doing Jack Thompson's mom, disgusting,unpleasant and downright shitty.

That being said, when in DotA games, you want to . . .

* Buy retarded or illogical shit
* Play terribly
* Rice in the jungle
* Pretend you don't speak English etc.
* Kill steal your teammates every chance you get.


Now for hero selections, generally you want to get heroes like these :

* Pick Holy Knight and cast Test of Faith on allies non stop.
* Pick Bloodseeker and cast (level 1) Bloodrage on allies (preferably int heroes) non stop.
* Pick Pudge and cast Hook on allies non stop.
* Pick Prophet and cast Sprout on allies non stop.
* Pick Clockwork Goblin and cast Power Cog near allies.
* Pick Bane Elemental and cast Nightmare on allies non stop.
* Pick Faceless Void and cast Chronosphere on allies when ranged enemy heroes are near by.
* Pick Proudmoore and cast X Marks The Spot when they're running away.
* Pick Tiny and toss their ass into a group of fags.
* Pick Vengeful Spirit, run into an enemy group, then use Nether Swap on an ally.
* Pick Keeper of the Light save enough gold for a blink dagger, blink into a place no one can get to or get out of your Ultimate Spell then cast Recall, which teleports people to you. Watch as they rage that they cant move.
* Pick Pitlord, buy boots of travel teleport around and take all of the creeps denying your allies gold, train your ultimate ability use it when standing near your allies and teleport them back to your base, over and over again, buy a referesher to do it faster.
* Pick Zeus, use your ulti to killsteal, get to lvl 16 and farm an Agathim's scepter and Refresher Orb, stay at fountain Killstealing your teammates every chance you get.
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Oct 4 2009 03:22pm
very n1 guide, 10/10
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Oct 4 2009 03:22pm
Had a bad day? That's quite a rage rant. At least you tried to be somewhat humorous, 7/10 for effort.

I think you missed a couple of fun heroes, like ES.

My personal favorite method of playing is giving first blood and saying,

"MY POOL IS ON FIRE!"

and then leaving

This post was edited by deathbypepsi on Oct 4 2009 03:23pm
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Oct 4 2009 04:15pm
Quote (deathbypepsi @ Sun, Oct 4 2009, 02:22pm)
Had a bad day? That's quite a rage rant. At least you tried to be somewhat humorous, 7/10 for effort.

I think you missed a couple of fun heroes, like ES.

My personal favorite method of playing is giving first blood and saying,

"MY POOL IS ON FIRE!"

and then leaving


Looks like you're mad.
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Oct 4 2009 04:51pm
Quote (BetterThanJesus @ Sun, Oct 4 2009, 10:15pm)
Looks like you're mad.


I'm livid, but that's besides the point.
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Oct 4 2009 05:01pm
Quote (deathbypepsi @ Sun, Oct 4 2009, 03:51pm)
I'm livid, but that's besides the point.


No need to get mad because op is the best dota player to ever grace the shittiness of warcraft 3
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Oct 6 2009 11:24am
10/10 pub guide
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Oct 6 2009 11:30am
10/10

Godly.
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Oct 8 2009 12:06pm
not funny...
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Oct 9 2009 02:44pm
Lame :Z
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