Just evolved my first Eevee, it was a 461 - evolved into a 1145 Flareon

594 bulbasaur from an egg!
Only have 10 candies tho lol.

Dammn thats gonna be beast when you finally get that ivysaur

Egg pokemon are the best because of all the candies it gives you. Nice CP too!

How do I use the eggs?

Go to your pokemon page and top right hit the eggs page, click on it, incubate, tie your phone to your dog with the app running, take nap, wake up, check for mew.

What if my dog never fucking moves unless i take him out and go running with him?

Fan?

No

It goes by distance on GPS and it only updates every few minutes, and it's linear distance.

Do people drive? Or is that too fast?

Driving doesn't work

if you are going slow it will track a fraction of the distance you travelled

Walk, bike run

Leave it on when you're at the store?

In traffic you'd rack up the distance cause stop and go