Quote (Saenchai @ 10 Nov 2012 22:27)
oké
>get pretty terrible stomach virus
>eating huge servings of chicken and eggs erryday
>farting near-constantly, literally upwards of once a minute for hours after each meal
>not babby farts either, I'm talking hot, disgustingly smelly farts, all day every day
>a few days into this disgusting fuckery, I end up messing my entire routine up
>have 5 egg whites, 2 whole eggs, ~400g chicken breast and a load of beans all within about 6 hours
>suddenly not farting nearly as much
>confused as fuck
>go to bed about 2 hours later
>wake up at 3 AM to some intense stomach pain, nausea and a strange feeling in my bowels
>start to get up to move to the toilet, but alas, this causes the beast within to shift
>stop moving
>oh god what do I do
>WHAT DO I DO
>go to lay back down
>completely lose control of my anus
>do the loudest fart I have ever done
>it's incredibly hot, like actually feels like it's burning my sphincter
>pain immediately stops
>still feeling pretty sick
>"oh, good, I guess"
>roll over
>fart gets pushed out from under bedsheets
>catch a whiff
>immediately vomit all over myself
>ALMOST shit myself but manage to hold it in and get to the fucking toilet in time