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Mar 2 2020 01:47am
we met on tinder and have been on 3 dates together, and we're both absolutely smitten with each other so far, ive got severe anxiety though, which i did tell her its a long story but to cut that part short i watched my best friend die, so you can paint a picture from that.

the concern i have is that she may be talking to other guys and i hate the idea of that, yes im not counting my chickens before they hatch but shes the most compatible woman that ive met yet and i think im falling head over heels too quickly for her, im just not entirely sure what to do as its been 7-8 years since ive been in a relationship and thats all i really want at this point in time. shes 23 and im 24 if that helps in anyway?

any questions fire away.
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Mar 2 2020 03:32am
Curious, why are you concerned that she’s talking to other guys?
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Mar 2 2020 05:31am
She's 23. Expect the worst, that's still an explorative age (but I say this living in a student city where dating and relations are really quite different than countryside stuff). She's simply entitled to talking with other people that may match her wants and needs more, but only time will tell.
All you can do is be you, and it's her job to find out if she wants to explore things with you or with somebody else. You're obviously quite free to continue and show your interest in her and I hope it will work out wonderously for you :)
If she's interested in somebody else over the true you, then-- would you really want to spend your time with her? I'm personally attracted to those who seem genuine in their interest in me and who are true to themselves.
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Mar 2 2020 09:54am
Quote (Forg0tten @ Mar 2 2020 06:31am)
She's 23. Expect the worst, that's still an explorative age (but I say this living in a student city where dating and relations are really quite different than countryside stuff). She's simply entitled to talking with other people that may match her wants and needs more, but only time will tell.
All you can do is be you, and it's her job to find out if she wants to explore things with you or with somebody else. You're obviously quite free to continue and show your interest in her and I hope it will work out wonderously for you :)
If she's interested in somebody else over the true you, then-- would you really want to spend your time with her? I'm personally attracted to those who seem genuine in their interest in me and who are true to themselves.


Was going to say something similar.

You're both quite young, so unless she feels the same way that you do (head over heels) - I would tread carefully.
Prepare yourself for the worst, so you don't get hurt.

I went through a similar situation with my current girlfriend. I fell for her pretty hard after 2-3 dates. I didn't act like it though, played it slowly, and eventually, SHE asked me to make it exclusive. (Little over a month after our first date)

We're 30 years old though.

This post was edited by Corsinoxcore on Mar 2 2020 09:54am
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Mar 3 2020 02:44am
Quote (Corsinoxcore @ Mar 2 2020 07:32pm)
Curious, why are you concerned that she’s talking to other guys?


anxiety dude, plays with my head too harshly sometimes

with all that being said should i just ask atleast or tell her how i feel about her? just unsure about where i should be stepping at this point in time
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Mar 3 2020 03:04am
Quote (ChaosIII @ Mar 2 2020 03:47pm)
we met on tinder


nuff said bro. Stopped reading after this. Can already tell it's gonna be problematic

Love is 1 of those things you can't find. It finds you.
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Mar 3 2020 08:27am
Quote (Gwiido @ Mar 3 2020 04:04am)
nuff said bro. Stopped reading after this. Can already tell it's gonna be problematic

Love is 1 of those things you can't find. It finds you.


Meh, that's a little subjective. Lots of people have found love via dating apps.
That's how it goes in this day and age.

Quote (ChaosIII @ Mar 3 2020 03:44am)
anxiety dude, plays with my head too harshly sometimes

with all that being said should i just ask atleast or tell her how i feel about her? just unsure about where i should be stepping at this point in time


I feel that.
My opinion is to just play it cool. Plan another date (Don't be spending too much money on these girls upfront) and see how it goes.
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Mar 3 2020 05:59pm
Sounds like you should learn to manage your anxiety first. If her simply talking to other males is enough to give you heightened anxiety you're in no position to be entering a committed relationship.

Anxiety is not something to be brushed off, you can't get away with saying "I have bad anxiety" to avoid or control situations. You need to fix it.
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Mar 3 2020 09:18pm
Let me show you this video and hopefully you'll have an idea of what you want to have in a relationship for yourself.

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Mar 4 2020 12:51am
Quote (Hecht55 @ Mar 4 2020 09:59am)
Sounds like you should learn to manage your anxiety first. If her simply talking to other males is enough to give you heightened anxiety you're in no position to be entering a committed relationship.

Anxiety is not something to be brushed off, you can't get away with saying "I have bad anxiety" to avoid or control situations. You need to fix it.


dont get me wrong ive learned to deal with it i push myself into stressful situations, being a volunteer firefighter especially in the senior role that i am i have alot of responsibilities, but from what ive read im probably just over reacting to what seems to be a small situation which reading what i have has given me some closure.
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