On Non-monogamy And Education - Topic

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Apr 18 2018 08:28pm

Quote (GetOnYourKnees @ Apr 18 2018 07:21pm)

Cheated on only.

Turns out she did me a favour. We were each other’s firsts so I had no idea back then that sex didn’t have to be so fucking boring... anyway, the other guy got bored with her too after a couple of weeks, rekt

Education should concentrate on safe sex imo, which is not necessarily dependent upon monogamy.

I agree with this. Just focus on safe sex and stds. Unfortunately a lot of schools don’t even have sex Ed though.

Voyaging

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#32

Apr 18 2018 08:31pm

Quote (dark-soul @ Apr 18 2018 10:28pm)

I agree with this. Just focus on safe sex and stds. Unfortunately a lot of schools don’t even have sex Ed though.

Yeah I don't really see the use of teaching romance and relationships in K-12 curriculum at all. It's not a public health concern. Teach safe sex and how sex fits into healthy relationships. Let people figure out love on their own. There may be some merit to teaching specific aspects of relationships that directly contribute to the public good, e.g. the vast superiority of two-parent monogamous relationships for raising children.

This post was edited by Voyaging on Apr 18 2018 08:32pm

Plaguefear

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#33

Apr 18 2018 08:32pm

Quote (Voyaging @ Apr 19 2018 01:25pm)

Completely agreed on all points, though I've personally never been cheated on (that I know of anyway, but I'm very confident about it).

If someone intends on cheating in an exclusive relationship, at least break up with your partner before doing so.

I've known many people in polyamorous relationships and they've nearly invariably ended poorly, either due to jealousy or whatever else. That's not to say they can't work. I think they are especially more viable in cultures where it's traditionally accepted e.g. Mormonism. But not for me, and not for most people.

Problem is the current meta is joint finances, completely intertwined lives, so its not as simple as just breaking up for a one night stand.
I stayed in a relationship where i was unhappy for 2 years just because it was too much effort to break up, luckily she cheated on me and i was able to find the willpower to untangle that mess.

EndlessSky

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#34

Apr 18 2018 08:32pm

Quote (Saucisson6000 @ Apr 18 2018 08:38pm)

The default configuration is monogamy and fidelity, after that you are free to catch Hiv or resistant Gonorrhea if you want, but do not encourage children to go in that way....

Great post, my friend!

Handcuffs

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#35

Apr 18 2018 08:33pm

Quote (Voyaging @ Apr 18 2018 06:31pm)

I think teaching how to navigate the development and expression of one's values, especially in a consent-based education, to be of critical importance when it comes to sex education, personally. People end up, if anything, learning about the potential consequences of sex/unprotected sex, and so our education tends to focus on education geared towards information about sexual health when things don't go smoothly. However, I think it's also important to teach and open up discussions about how to navigate relationships when things are going well.

This post was edited by Handcuffs on Apr 18 2018 08:34pm

Voyaging

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#36

Apr 18 2018 08:33pm

Quote (Plaguefear @ Apr 18 2018 10:32pm)

You don't have to figure all that shit out immediately. If you really can't control yourself and you haven't specifically discussed allowing polyamory, then you have the responsibility to inform them beforehand you intend on sleeping with someone else.

Plaguefear

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#37

Apr 18 2018 08:36pm

Quote (Voyaging @ Apr 19 2018 01:33pm)

If we were that open and expressive it would never get to cheating in the first place...

Voyaging

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#38

Apr 18 2018 08:40pm

Quote (Plaguefear @ Apr 18 2018 10:36pm)

If we were that open and expressive it would never get to cheating in the first place...

Lol perhaps.

excellence

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#39

Apr 18 2018 09:03pm

Quote (GetOnYourKnees @ 18 Apr 2018 21:21)

Cheated on only.

Turns out she did me a favour. We were each other’s firsts so I had no idea back then that sex didn’t have to be so fucking boring... anyway, the other guy got bored with her too after a couple of weeks, rekt

Education should concentrate on safe sex imo, which is not necessarily dependent upon monogamy.

this is a good post

inkanddagger

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#40

Apr 18 2018 10:28pm

Quote (thesnipa @ Apr 18 2018 05:12pm)

Never / never.

Conservative in my seed spreading days. 10 blissful years with Mrs thesnipa.

I do not believe in nonmonogamy for 2 reasons. Both essentially the same. Increased exposure to diseases and pregnancies. And increased exposure to "the feels". Rather than a 2 faceted will they want a relationship game it becomes 3 4 or 5+. Its unsustainable for individuals but as a long term revolving pool for noncommittal types I suppose

That is to say in my experience for straight Americans. No comment on lgbtq or foreigners.

Not believing in it has zero effect on other people getting laid.

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