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justbesuck
#1 Feb 5 2017 01:30pm
Group: Member
Posts: 10,004
Joined: Jun 23 2012
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Hey guys, i was a little afraid of posting this... Im still very young, so much to learn, yet alot of knowledge,

I hope you guys will take it easy and maybe come with some postive feedback, on what to do, or not to do.

here it goes.

Truely understanding eachother, like no one ever could.

Even if i didnt know you in person, even if your miles away. There was something strong. Your afraid off me, afraid of the unknown, you are the same... Thats why youre so scared, you never know whats next.

You were the only one who understanded me, being told years after years... You feel like your not being understanded, it gave me alot of trouble in my life that i can never turn back, i have trust issues now.... I trusted you.

And yet, you didnt seem to get that, maybe i am a weird person, not supossed to be on this earth, you gave me a little hope that i could, sometimes we didnt talk for days, some we did... Day after day, it would always remain the same.

Time went by, you toke your own path, the connection we had... Its fading away, im slipping back in the old days not knowing who i am and what i will become... Emptyness.

Emptyness is overwhelming me, still no one gets it, life is hopeless for me. There is no reason to be here, every day is the same painfull tragedy, over and over. People still ask alot, i cant.

We were diffrent... We went through this together, i didnt need to talk to you to feel it, you where always there for me. And now... You probably dont even realise it, but you left me all alone.

Back at where i was, a few years later, when everything was supossed to be good... I slipped back in the dark hole, my mind. I become a psycho, im afraid... Im in pain... It is a feeling without a name.

Voices came back in my head, yet again im on a diffrent planet, my body remains on earth, people dont know what im capable off, she did. She believed in me... And all out of sudden it changed.

Im writing this in tears even if i dont feel a thing, i will take this with my grave, i will never get over it, a soul... Full of scratches.

I would like to share more storys to the person whoever deserves it, but i cant anymore, not now. Not soon

I love you all stay strong, ❤️

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