I must begin this post by admitting that I believe
I am the second coming of Christ, this is not a troll attempt. If you're still reading this, you have most likely already subscribed to the idea that I am nuts.
Which might be true.
I'm not entirely sure where to I should begin the story of my journey as the second coming of Christ, but I will let you know now that my destination is nearly identical to that of the first Jesus. Because my destiny has laid itself out before me, I know that it is necessary that I begin my entrance into the known world riding my steed as ridiculously as possible.
I should let you know that I was also born of a virgin. Not the type of virgin that hadn't had sex yet, but the type of virgin that is pathological enough to tell others she was a virgin during the circumstances of my birth, the type of story that can be confirmed with some astrological voodoo bullshit. Which is only half of the problem of contraception. But my father, who is also pathological, is the vague type of pathological that would allow for a lie as grand as virgin birth - to perpetuate.
So I am the child of two magnificent liars, and it is my understanding that both of their genetics were amazingly dominant. Therefor I'm the best kind of liar, I'm the type of liar that'll only tell you what you already know. I lie by both being vague and offering too much information to hid the truth. I am the type of liar that won't let the circumstances of my own birth prevent me from being the hero of my own story. I am the beginning and the end.
Where does this leave me? Well in the context of your now wondering what the purpose of this post is, I'm a Christian Atheist and I want to share my ideas with fellowship. I was raised in the Church, I held the convictions of what I believed the bible to mean (in the Santa clausey literal type of way) from as early as my memory will allow me, until August 24th, 2012. Then I decided to allow 2 men to convince me otherwise on the big screen of a USO in Afghanistan. When I was fighting a war against the enemies of God, it was really easy for me to pull the trigger - so this was probably the worst possible time to be so easily manipulated when the trip back to camp was infested with "bad guys."
But it happened, there was a lot of doubt building up to the occurrence inside that media tent sanctuary of the war zone, but it happened like a light switch within 30 minutes conclusion of the show "Penn & Teller's: Bullshit." I had lost my faith the size of a mustard seed. If you have ever struggled with losing your religion, you could probably sympathize pretty well with how much of the identity of a pastor's kid is tangled up in that. (Otherwise, imagine you were once black but you found out that you were actually white.) Devastated.
After laying low for a while and building my hatred of religion, I went full-blown militant atheist. I was very well set up to be an atheist, I knew the bible better than most & I couldn't let the 20 year old wisdom go to waste!
Being a lost sheep wasn't entirely bad. It gave me a huge gap of understanding, where I could assign my own meaning to things. Where the Bible had told me the correct answer, yet the "correct" answer was no longer applicable to modern life, I was able to create my own "correct" answers. What incredible liberation it was! The bondage of not knowing why was gone. I still have so much of my existence rooted in Bible, I never sought to eradicate all of it, I'm to lazy for that. I only needed to invent a way to make it work. Besides, you can't bullshit a better bullshitter. So now
I'll be the hero of the Next Testament.Until later in my life, I expect to be doubted by everyone. As long as I can show a few people how to be fishers of men, I could really care less if it is believed that I am the son of God.
So what now? I intend on continuing my life as Jesus v 2.0, I intend on revealing myself more in ways that others may understand & I intend on being as rebellious as possible - in just the same way Christ is.
Pray for me.