Really fucking frustrating. Anyone have a fix? I get the failed to join game 4 out of 5 games I join.

Could very well be the servers. However, I find that giving a good 15 second delay between any join/create game action to be beneficial.

I know it's a pain, because I'm always rushing to keep up with certain Baal runs, but it's better than a FTJ message and not being in the game.

i think everyone is getting them
quick tip: if you get ftj back out to char screen and come back, works for me every time. unsure of how to prevent them altogether though

what about realmed? ive been down for over an hour

You can try one of these guides

Realm down guide
R/d Temp ban guide
Bypass Temp IP guide

for me the ftj is ONLY happening on the east server. ive been playing west and have not had this once, but on east its about 25percent ftj for me. now if only there was somebody else on west lol