posted here like 2-3 weeks ago. gf of 3 years broke up with me.
today she called me up. talked for a bit about random shit. then she says that she would like it if we could start over, as friends, and see where that leads us to.
she says that she would love to have a future with the person i plan on becoming (told her im starting to change, been doing alot of things, basically trying to better myself every way i can)
but she just wants to stay friends..and see where it goes. take things very slow.

problem is this was a internet type relationship. 1 year into calling/txting/etc i go up to be with her and i stay for 3 years. now im back in texas and shes still in missouri. (so now its long distance again)

k leme wrap this up cause im sure most of you got important shit to do.

i was in love with this girl before she broke up with me. and i still kind of am.

sooo...should i go for it? give it another chance? start as fresh friends and see where that leads us?? or should i just say no..and move on with my life.

would like to hear from someone with experience with this sort of thing. getting back with your ex via starting over as friends. but any advice helps

This post was edited by war-hero on Jun 13 2012 12:44am

It almost never works out.... ever.

I tried to be friends with the one girl I have ever actually loved and shown such affection towards, and it fell straight into the ground. At first you'll be completely fine with it. You'll see each other a few times, start talking about what you've done, fun and bad... then you'll start talking about each other's past moments spent together. It escalates from there to starting to act upon these in either several different ways; Jealousy, resentment, embarrassment, hatred, or the most unexpected possible... a little joyful. Almost always there will be jealousy and resentment.

Since you two live such a far distance and its nothing physical and cannot see actual emotion; casually talk to her. Don't make it anything more than what it is. Ex's are ex's for a reason, and never get it confused. It will remain that way, and the only way it will not be any different is if you and her put an UNBELIEVABLE amount of effort into entwining your future, along with your present. To me, its not worth the effort at all what so ever.

Also, I kinda get the vibe in which you are hoping for your two future to stay if you are thinking about pursuing her again, with such great distance, and that can be a bad thing. Knowing when to let go isn't giving up, it isn't being rude or selfish... its knowing when and what is best for the both of your lives, not just yours.

depends on

what do you want?

are you two apart for school? is there any chance of living close together any time soon?

need more details imo but to follow the cliche, long distance only works if both people are committed. not only that, but you probably already realize how hard it is to keep it interesting after a couple months. you can only get so much satisfaction via skype and your phones

Tell her you need more time
And when I say more time, I mean no contact at all. Forget her as much as possible. And then MAYBE if you feel like talking to her, maybe.
Few months at least.. Or a year

I say cut your losses and move on. Perhaps you can be friends further down the line after a few years and the dust settles... too soon to just be friends. Either youll be right back where you were or it will crash and burn