Józsi bá’ és egy fiatal horgász beszélget:
- Te Józsi bátyám, hogy lehet az, hogyha maga lejön süllőzni egyik nap, akkor süllőt fog, másik nap lejon pontyozni, akkor meg pontyot? Honnan tudja, hogy mikor mire kell horgászni?
Erre Józsibá:
- Hát reggel, amikor felkelnék, akkor előtte a hátamra fekszek és meghúzom a farkam fölfelé és ha balra dől süllőzök, ha jobbra, akkor pontyozok.
Másnap ki is próbálja a fiatal. Reggel meghúzza a farkát, de nem dől el, hanem egyenesen áll. Amikor találkozik Józsibával akkor megkérdezi, hogy ilyenkor mi van? Aszongya Józsi bá’:
- Ha egyenesen marad, akkor kefélni kell menni, nem pedig horgászni!

köszi

Three third-graders, a Jew, an Italian, and an African American are on the playground at recess. The Jewish kid suggests that they play a new game. "Let's see who has the largest dick," he says. "Okay," they all agree.

The Jewish kid pulls down his zipper and whips it out. "That's nothing," says the Italian kid. He whips his out. His is a couple of inches longer. Not to be outdone, the African American whips his out. It is by far the biggest, dwarfing the other two in both length and width. The Jewish and Italian kid are stunned and amazed. "Wow, that thing is huge!" they exclaim.

That night, eating dinner at home, the African American's mother asks him what he did at school today.

"Oh, we worked on a science project, had a math test and read out loud from a new book ...and during recess, my friends and I played "Let's see who has the largest dick."

"What kind of game is that, honey?" asks his mother.

"Well, me, Sidney and Anthony each pulled out our penises, and I had the biggest! The other kids say its because I'm black. Is that true, Mom?"

The mom replies: "No, honey. It's because you're twenty-three."

Disznócska, miért van kiírva a házadra hogy Pb?
- azért, mert az az ólom jele…