Sup guys, It's me Loochi.
I'm a person who doesn't talk shit or waste time so I'ma get straight to the point.
I was at this foreign exchange chicks house puttin the pipe down to her and was ready to bust when suddenly I get an emergency phone call from the hospital.. I immediatly pulled out my wang out of this broads taco and busted on her hair to occupy her while I took this call and see what the fuck's up.
Loochi: *panting for breathe from the sex* Sup pussy?
Dr Jones: Loochi, you're friend Lil T has been in an accident in town last night and got stabbed by gang members who refer to them self as the clips... They wear blue clothes and have a dance that is similar to Michael Jackson's moo--
Loochi: Clips? The fuck you on about son. It's crips. I'll be at the hospital in 5 mins.
About now the Doc's on the phone cryin and shit apologisin for his mistake about the crips, probably thought I was gonna go over there to kick his ass. Tempting as it may be, but I gotta see my best friend and gotta get the down low on this shit and see why anyone but me would bash this innocent kid.
I arrive at the hospital and see T there laying half dead with what appeared to be a stab wound.. Not a good site. I grip my fist in anger..
Loochi: Give to me straight doc.. Was that stab caused by a high %age of open wound from that knife?
Dr Jones: VERY high. Any sharp object has 100% change opening the wound an--
Loochi: ANY? Those fucking crips woulda been using something more than a atlantean sword. You think that shit causes OW?
Dr Jones: Sword? No no I think you totally misunderstood, it was a kn--
Loochi: I don't wanna fuckin' hear it you indian fag. I'll be back tonight to see how he's doin.
Dr Jones: *Shakin like a bitch* Here's the card and the password to get access to the hospital! We trust you not to do anything stup--
Loochi: *Looks at him like a thug*
Dr Jones: *Springs off and screams for help like a bitch*
I walk over to T and see the IV machine hooked up to him giving him O2 and blood. The thought of losin my best friend is beyond comprehension. I opened a fresh bottle of corona and skulled it back and took one deep look at T.
Loochi: You're one ugly motherfucker... And a gay fag... But know one does this shit to my homie. I'll heal you up buddy. And the moment you wake up, I'm gonna kick your ass and send you back here for wasting my time.
At that very moment, An great idea (like always) came to mind and I knew the quickest way to heal T in his slumber and get him back on his feet in no time. Something even these pussy doc's couldn't have thought of. I drove down to the dairy and took a huge jug of grape juice and didn't pay for it, I walked out with it just like a true playa would. This grape juice jug resembled 100% rejuvination potion. I snuck it in under my t shirt which what appeared to people that I have gained 20 pounds. I walk in to T's room and I un hook the IV machine and empty it out. The machines start to beep furiously, maybe because there was nothing in them or some shit, but that will be takin care of once I put the grape juice in there and it will run straight to his veins. Can't wait to see the results
I hooked the machines back up with the grape juice in it but T started to spaz out ! (wtf?) maybe it was part of the healing process.
Loochi: Hang in there T! This full rejuvination will heal you faster than these pussy ass tablets they given ya!
I looked at his wound but it still didn't close up so I jus put a dirty napkin over it from the feed I had earlier. The beep started to ring even harder and security comes in the room.
Davis: Excuse me sir, we're going ot have to ask you to leave. We need to check these machines for any foreign substances.
Loochi: Tryna stop T from gettin back to his feet ahy!? Over my dead body !
I pushed off the old man sleeping next to T and threw the bed at the security sending him through the wall. Blood and shit was all over the place. The beeping was too loud for me and I knew that by tomorrow T will be back to normal.
Loochi: This is some boring shit son, I'll see you tomorrow when you're all good. I'ma go to D Baby's for some drinks.
I jus walked out dustin my hands and thinkin to my self..
"Ahh Loochi. Is there anything you can't do?"
